Orenji no Taiyou
by Moon Minamino
Summary: Orange setting sun. Minamino Shuuichi has much to deal with: homophobic parents, stereotypical friends, feelings of inadequacy and abandonment, and a love he will never experience. This is his life, this is his death. His passion and his pain. YxK
1. Proud Owner

**Moon: **So here is my new story. I will finish it. I swear I will. I have a beta to keep me in line this time.

So anyway, this is a gay story. Do not read this if you don't like the idea of Shuuichi being gay. Do not flame me for making Shuuichi gay. I don't want to hear your crap. Take it to some one who cares about what you have to say on the matter.

As for everyone else, constructive criticism is welcomed. I would love to hear your suggestions, your comments, concerns, and what you would like to see happen in this story. I know where I am going with this; however side ideas and fluff is welcomed. I want you guys to like this story and I hope you guys appreciate the hard work I have put into this.

I am not the only one who has put work into this, though. Please, check out my beta's stories. You can find her under the penname Ryuuie Mizishi. I chose her because she is one of my all time favorite authors and she is an awesome writer. I encourage you to read her stories and review (but don't bother her to write more). If you like this story, you will die for hers.

Now let's get on with this thing!

Disclaimer: Moon Minamino does not own Yu Yu Hakusho or the original plot idea.

---

I remember going through two big white doors, and then everything went dark. Looking back on it all, I would have done it the same. However, if I have no regrets, why do I feel so badly about my decisions in life? I say I have no regrets, I think I would have done everything the same if given the chance to make my mistakes again, and yet…and yet I am not so sure myself. My being is full of self-doubt and questions.

Those two doors…were they the doors that lead to the place of my death? I remember the smell of blood. Was it my blood? It is possible. Maybe that is what that crimson stain on my favorite shirt was.

I remember a voice. _Clear._ Was I in a hospital? _His pulse is going! We're loosing him._ Why did they put me into the hospital? _The cuts are too deep…_ What cuts? I don't remember any cuts. _The knife is in too deep._ I was wondering where my army knife went. _Stop…We've lost him. _And then everything went dark.

Chapter One

The school bell sounded as a flock of fifteen-year-olds left their classes. Everyone went about doing their own thing: mopping the floors, cleaning the chalk boards, doing their fair share in the school cleanup. After that was done, everyone went to their respected clubs. It was very uncommon for a student of Meiou High to not participate in an after school club. Any student who wanted in good with the teachers stayed late. Then, why was it that the smartest kid in school always left early? What was he hiding?

Minamino Shuuichi was your above average high school student. He always made all A's, he always got the top score on the test, he always cut the curve, he was popular, and he was hot. So why then, would he rush home as if afraid of the closeness he could experience if he actually made friends among his classmates?

As Shuuichi snuck away from his teacher's watchful eye, other students questioned his intentions. He had the perfect life, the perfect girlfriend, and the perfect hair. Hell, his hair was better then his girlfriend's.

Girlfriend. That was a new concept for most people. Ever since any of his fellow classmates could remember, every girl in Shuuichi's grade would throw themselves at him and he would turn each and every girl down. It came as a shock when Hotaru Dai announced that she was dating the heartthrob and Shuuichi did not deny it. He didn't confirm it, but he didn't deny it. For the longest time, no one believed Dai. Then one day a student saw her kiss him and he did not push her away.

So why then, if he had so much to stick around for, did Shuuichi insist on cutting himself off from his peers?

"Mother," the red headed teen said as he opened the door, "I'm home."

"Shuuichi, dear," a light-hearted voice called out in reply, "make dinner, your father will be home soon."

"He's not my father," Shuuichi would mutter under his breath as he began to put together an easy to make stir fry meal.

This is how it was every day: come home, get ordered to do something for his 'father', and do it mindlessly like a trained puppy.

---

Homework was easy. All he had to do were a few math problems and some English work. Shuuichi had finished the rest of his work the day before. Thank Kami for Gold Week. Just what everyone needed was a break. Too bad for Shuuichi that his would be all work.

_Journal,_

_Koenma-sama, the young king-to-be of the Spirit World, has asked Yuusuke, Hiei, and I to retrieve a treasure that was stolen from the King's vault by a rowdy demon named Jiro. We are set to leave tomorrow. Kuwabara is staying behind this time as cover for Yuusuke. Not that he needs any. I would use Kuwabara as cover if Mother wasn't married. However, every since _he_ became a part of the family, it has become easier to get away with most things. _

_Since he is a doctor, he works late and when he is home, he is all Mother takes notice of. He and younger Shuuichi, my step-brother, occupy all of Mother's time. I go unnoticed, and while it is easier to sneak out and do my job with the gang, I must say it saddens me. I miss the times when I was the one Mother waited on to return home. Though it doesn't matter much, I suppose._

_In related news, Step-Father has in fact become a politician. He is trying to're-westernize' Japan in a political sense. He has heard about America's President trying to ban things such as Gay marriages and fighting wars on Terror. Step-Father has adopted those conservative ideas for himself and has begun to force these ideals onto the higher-ups in the Japanese parliament._

_It isn't just in politics he is doing this though. He found out my friend Fujita from school is gay. He has been banned from my home. Step-Father has become a homophobic bastard and he has begun to have Mother think the same way. To avoid suspicion, as well as to please Mother, I asked out some girl in my class. I forget her name though. _

_I know how that sounds, but no, I am not stringing her along. I explained the situation to her and she was happy to help. It isn't that bad really. I take her out to eat every once in a while, and we will go to a movie. It makes people think it is real. She has become my…I think the American word for it is fag-hag. It has worked so far._

_-Shuuichi_

Shuuichi finished his journal entry and stashed the book under his bed covers as a knock came from the door. Without permission, a shorter boy with greasy black hair and chocolate brown eyes entered the room.

"Oi! 'Rama!" The younger boy of fourteen called Shuuichi by a shortened version of his true demon name.

"Good Evening Yuusuke, you are here on Koenma-sama's behalf, I assume?" Shuuichi pretended to brush his hair as he made sure the book was well hidden before standing.

The half-demon boy was busy checking himself in a nearby mirror. He had noticed Shuuichi's odd behavior in the mirror, but pretended not to notice. "It's time to go. The shrimp," as Yusuke playfully called Hiei, their third team member, "is waiting impatiently at Genkai's for us. Botan is going to take us to Spirit World and from there we are going into the demon world."

Botan was the overly-perky, not-too-grim grim reaper, or, as she liked to call it, ferry girl of the river Styx. She was their main mode of transportation. She flew by oar…Well, she ran people over by oar at least.

It was all very frightening.

"Yuusuke, I need to go pick up some things from school before we leave. I forgot that we are to clean out lockers today. Everything left behind is being thrown away and there are things I need," Shuuichi smiled. "It will only take a moment."

Yuusuke frowned, a winkle forming at the top of his nose. "Since when do you forget things? That's not like you."

"I've…had a lot on my mind recently." The truth was easy to spill, as long as it was not detailed. "You can wait here if you would like," Shuuichi offered.

Yuusuke looked around the off-white room. It was not what he was used to. It was too clean and empty.

The room contained a window on the right hand wall. Under the window in the corner was a western style bed with plain white sheets and a white pillow. Next to the bed was a desk that contained a few books and a flip day calendar. Kitty-corner from the bed, there was a rosewood dresser. Atop the dresser was a vanity mirror. There was another full length mirror behind the door. This was the mirror the raven-haired teen had used upon his arrival.

Yeah, compared to Yuusuke's apartment, this was just way too clean. "I'll come with you." Yuusuke frowned as he noticed Shuuichi tense up at his statement.

"All right, I suppose…"

Shuuichi lead the younger boy out of the room, his mind dense with "what-if" thoughts. Yuusuke followed with suspicion. What was he hiding?

"Where are you going?" Just as luck would have it, Shuuichi's step-dad came in right as the two boys were leaving.

"School, I forgot some books," Shuuichi moved from the doorway to let his step-dad in, "We'll be back in ten minutes tops." The older man nodded and allowed the two teens to leave.

Shuuichi hurriedly walked down the street, Yuusuke in tow. It was obviously a high-end neighborhood. All of the houses were big, by Japan's crowded standards, and had small lawns with even a tree or two here and there. The roads were freshly painted and all of the stop signs were new with fresh printed kanji.

Before he knew it, Yuusuke found himself staring at a large school with a front lawn and a mid-courtyard entrance. "This way," Shuuichi mumbled. Yuusuke followed the taller boy through the court yard, up some stairs, and into the main building.

The halls were covered with lockers, all of which were painted a suggestive olive green. Shuuichi lead Yuusuke up another flight of stairs and through a white hallway until they reached another wall of olive green lockers.

Yuusuke watched as Shuuichi went to one and hurriedly opened it. 24-18-02. From this three number combination came nothing but a plastic grocery bag.

"I thought you told your step-dad you left books." Yuusuke stared at the bag. He couldn't make out much through the white translucent plastic, but he could definitely tell it was clothing. There was something familiar about it too.

"Well…I didn't exactly want him to know about this," Shuuichi chose his words carefully.

Yuusuke looked on thoughtfully for a moment before a relatively new bruise on his arm reminded him.

Two days ago, Yuusuke had been left alone in Keiko's room when she had to go help out in her parents' kitchen. Yuusuke, being the bored ADD-like perverted (you know, average) teenage boy he was, decided to go through her drawers.

"Those are panties in that bag!" Yuusuke accused. There was no mistaking the frilly edges and dainty figure of white fabric he was seeing against another, bigger piece of plaid fabric. "Whose are they? Where'd you get them? Can I see?" The questions began to pour out of Yuusuke's mouth.

Shuuichi winced. "Err…they're…they're Dai's!" He said, finally remembering the name he had failed to include in his earlier journal entry.

"But you said that you had never been to her house."

"I did? When?"

Shuuichi watched as his excuse plan began to unravel before him. Not good.

Yuusuke starred at the older boy. Something was going on, and he didn't like not knowing. _He is my friend, _Yuusuke thought, _so that means he'd tell me if something was up, right? Maybe he's been to Dai's house since the last time we talked. _

Shuuichi starred at Yuusuke, waiting to be called on his bluff.

"I'll make you a deal," Yuusuke smirked. "If you let me have those panties, I won't question any further."

Shuuichi tensed tighter. Yuusuke, the demi-god dream punk, wanted his panties. Granted, he didn't know they were his, he just knew they were panties. Logic said that panties equal girl. Eh, what Yuusuke didn't know couldn't hurt him. Shuuichi tossed him the lacy pink and white panties.

Yuusuke smirked in satisfaction, clearly proud of his newfound treasure. Who said you couldn't acquire panties without getting hit extremely hard in the arm by your girlfriend! Take that Keiko!

"You'd better put those away before we get home," Shuuichi warned. Yuusuke nodded and did as told before the two boys started walking back to the Minamino household.

---

**Moon:** So there you have it, chapter one. If you want to see my resolves for this story, check my profile. I have a list of things I will do for this story.

As I said above, ideas are welcome. Tell me what fluff you would like to see added to the overall plot line. I will take all reviews into careful consideration.

I leave for camp in July. I will try to post chapter two before I leave, but don't expect some miracle.


	2. New Green Mini

**Moon: **And here you have it—a miracle. Don't expect another. I leave for camp next week and the most I'll be able to get done is the beginning of chapter three.

I do have the majority of the next few chapters planned out, but not to a T. A lot of details are missing, but that's okay. They'll come. I also have a ton of ideas laid out, I just don't know in what order they will come. I should really draw a time line.

Thanks Ryuuie for beta reading.

Well, here you have it: chapter two. Remember, I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho or any of its characters.

---

Rain fell heavily on the ground. Inside of the wooden, traditional style temple, you could hear the peaceful sound of the rain hitting the tile roof and then pouring down, creating a mini waterfall from the ledge to the earth. If you were Minamino Shuuichi, this was the most peaceful sound around.

"I WANT TO GO!"

"YOU CAN'T GO, YOU IDIOT! YOU'RE TOO WEAK!"

"I DON'T CARE, I CAN TAKE YOU ANYTIME URAMESHI!"

"YOU WISH KUWABARA!"

Then there were not-to-peaceful sounds.

"Oh, shut up, both of you," came an annoyed female voice belonging to the blue-haired ferry girl. "If you don't, I won't take either of you, and Kurama and Hiei can have all of the demon-bashing to themselves."

Shuuichi winced at his demon name. He didn't want to be involved in the current argument. No, all Shuuichi wanted to do was get this assignment over with. He wanted to finish, go home, and go clubbing. Yes, clubbing in his new green mini would be fun.

Shuuichi was yanked from his fantasy land, "Oh sorry, what?"

"I said, what's the goofy grin for?" Yuusuke had apparently abandoned his argument when he noticed Shuuichi deep in thought.

"Oh…nothing." Shuuichi gave a nervous chuckle, trying to convince the younger boy nothing was happening inside of his red-haired head.

Yuusuke's face was overcome with a perverted grin. "You're thinking about Dai and how you got those panties?"

"What panties?" Botan piped up.

"You caught me Yuusuke," Shuuichi pretending to laugh light-heartedly. "That's exactly what I was thinking of."

Kuwabara chimed in, "Since when does Kurama go for panties?"

"HA! I knew it," Yuusuke was obviously proud of his imaginary mind reading powers.

Kuwabara and Botan growled. No one liked being ignored.

"Who's Dai?" Botan tried again.

Shuuichi smiled, "My girlfriend."

"Oh…" Botan stood up, walked over to Shuuichi and sat down in front of him. "I never thought I'd have to do this to you Kurama, but seeing as how you have your girlfriend's panties…." Botan lifted a hand and bitch-smacked Shuuichi, "PERVERT!"

_Oh the things I do to keep a secret. _

---

The rain grew louder as the group of teens sat in the living room. The paper sliding door was open, letting in a few drops of rain as the wind blew sideways. The rain was too heavy for Botan to fly them to the Demon world and the group had grown drowsy since the smacking incident.

Yuusuke was sitting against the oak wall, playing with a yo-yo he had found earlier when he had snuck into Genkai's game room. He had managed to grab the yo-yo before the seasoned martial artist kicked him out. He sat there perfecting his walk-the-dog technique.

Kuwabara was sitting with his back to the rest of the room. He was staring at a picture of Yukina, the teal-haired ice maiden, in his wallet. The rest of the group wasn't sure if he was holding a staring contest or not. Either way, no one could blame the orange-haired school boy. They were all bored.

Botan was kneeling at a low wooden table, blanket around her lap and a cup of tea in her hand. She was sitting opposite of Genkai, owner of the temple. The two had exchanged a few words on the theory of what King Enma did instead of ruling the underworld. They had gotten into an argument about whether or not he toyed with people's lives for his own amusement. The pair had grown quiet shortly after.

Hiei was sitting on the large wooden porch right outside the door. He was glaring at the rain, willing it to leave.

Shuuichi found his mind wondering back to the aspect of clubbing in his lime green mini and hot pink v-neck with his padded bra, of course. A few times he thought about Yuusuke dancing with him as well, though this could be due to the fact that Yuusuke was currently the most interesting person in the room. Around the world was better then an imaginary staring contest.

As Yuusuke preformed his yo-yo tricks, his mind was hard at work, deciphering what he had seen earlier that day.

_Shuuichi opened the door, as quietly as possible. His bag full of clothes was tucked discreetly under his arm as he tugged at the lock until it opened. _

_As the two boys entered the Minamino household, Yuusuke got the impression that Shuuichi wanted nothing more then to get in and get out without encountering his parents._

_They had made it up the stairs and to the top platform without interference. Yuusuke committed Shuuichi's hiding place to memory as the older boy tucked the clothing into a secret bottom drawer at the bottom of his dresser. The drawer was made to look like bottom decoration, but really slid out when pulled at hard enough._

_As Shuuichi tucked the clothes away, Yuusuke was able to see that they consisted of a plaid mini-skirt, a lime green mini-skirt, a pink V-neck, and a white blouse. There was also another pair of panties, this time black with red lace trim._

"_You got all of that from Dai?" _

"I'm a thief, remember?" Shuuichi had positioned himself so that Yuusuke could not actually see inside of the drawer.

"_Who knew you were such a pervert?" _

"I'm a thief, remember?" Shuuichi closed the drawer and put the bag in a trash can. "It comes with the territory."

_As the two boys walked from the room, his step-dad came out of the bathroom and looked at them curiously. "I didn't hear you come in," he frowned. It was obvious this man did not like being out of the loop._

"_Yeah, I'm sorry. I didn't hear anyone and assumed Mother was asleep. I wanted to be quiet," Shuuichi lied through his teeth._

"_Why were you in there for such a short amount of time? Where are you going now?" _

Damn, this dude keeps a short leash, _noted Yuusuke._

"_I had to store my books. Yuusuke and I were invited by Genkai-sama to spend a few days at her temple. Mother already said that was fine." _

He must not check with Shiori, _Yuusuke noted again, _Otherwise I'm sure Kurama wouldn't have just said that.

"_Who will be there?" _

"Just a bunch of the guys."

"No girls? Why don't you invite that girlfriend of yours?"

"_She's busy." At this Shuuichi began his journey downstairs. By the time Yuusuke realized Shuuichi had begun to move, he was already down the stairs. Yuusuke had to sprint to catch up with him._

Yuusuke was knocked from his thoughts by the yo-yo. He heard someone begin to laugh. Thinking it was a girl, he looked over, only to see Botan and Genkai still glaring at each other in silence. Upon further investigation, he found it was Kurama.

With a smile, Yuusuke glared. "Hey now, that's not funny. That could have really hurt me!"

"You've been hit harder in the head by Chuu," Shuuichi giggled. The Australian bloke had hit Yuusuke pretty hard in the Dark Tournament. If Yuusuke could take that, he could take a tap to the head by a yo-yo.

"Yeah, yeah," Yuusuke went back to playing with the toy.

As he watched the yo-yo spin for the tenth time, his mind thought back again. What else was Kurama hiding in that drawer? He wanted, no, _needed _to know.

Shuuichi continued to watch the raven-haired boy. He noticed Yuusuke's chocolate eyes were blank. Shuuichi's own forest green eyes sparkled, wondering what he was thinking about.

After a while, Yuusuke got frustrated and threw his yo-yo at the back of Kuwabara's head. Getting up, he stomped outside to stand and help Hiei glare at rain.

"Man, I thought he was doing well with the yo-yo," Kuwabara said, tangling the yo-yo while he attempted to walk-the-dog.

"I know; he only messed up the one time…" Shuuichi stood and went to join Hiei and Yuusuke on the porch.

_What is he hiding_? Yuusuke growled at the thought.

"Is something wrong Yuusuke?" Shuuichi asked, taking a step closer and putting a hand on the boy's shoulder.

"Kurama…you'd tell me if…" he sighed, "Never mind. Everything is fine; I'm just pissed at the dumb rain."

Shuuichi frowned, "Alright." Was Yuusuke suspicious?

Shuuichi thought back to the incident earlier. He had made sure that Yuusuke hadn't laid eyes upon his cloths, padded bra, or make up. Even is hair decorations where neatly tucked away. Maybe he had been too trusting when he opened his secret drawer in front of Yuusuke.

No, everything was going to be just fine.

---

**Moon: **Alright, did you like it? I think every two chapters; I'm going to exchange my page limit by one. This was just, just over four pages without these beginning and end note thingies.

Let me know what you thought.


	3. Teaser

**Moon:** Don't say it. I know this isn't four pages long. Let me explain.

I went to camp and wrote another page but it was blah. I decided to use camp as a brainstorming week and just write when I got home. I came home and sat down. I reread what I had in chapter three and I couldn't bring myself to add to it. I just love this chapter too much how it is.

I told Ryuuie that I didn't want to add to it, but I didn't want to post such a short chapter. She suggested posting it as a teaser chapter since it is a large part of the overall plot.

So here you have it: Chapter three of Orenji no Taiyou. I promise my next one will be longer. I plan to make myself write at least five pages.

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters or Yu Yu Hakusho.

---

Tokyo city- one of the most densely populated cities in the world. Tokyo has twelve million, five hundred twenty-seven thousand, one hundred and fifteen people with a density of five thousand, six hundred and fifty-five people per square kilometer. Compare Tokyo to Chicago's two million, eight hundred forty-two thousand, five hundred and eighteen with a density of four thousand, eight hundred sixty-seven people per square kilometer. One can only imagine how hard it would be to find someone in such a crowd.

However, the throngs of people did not bother one girl who was used to the masses.

A brunette girl with chocolate brown eyes dashed through the streets and to a certain corner maid café. Inside of the maid café, all of the waiters were young girls in maid outfits. They flirted with tourists and men while serving anyone and everyone who opened the door. It was not horribly perverted, just a little playful.

The girl seemed to have more trouble in the café than in the streets. She looked over the mob of tourists with maids flocking around them, bringing teas, cakes, and cookies. The brunette had to stand on a chair to find who she was looking for.

"Konnichiwa!" she said, her voice soft and sweet. "Genki desu ka?"

"Ah, finally." A girl with long black hair and grass green eyes stood and hugged the girl. "I am fine, how are you? I trust your trip here was safe."

"Yes, and yours?"

"Same as always," the girl took a sip of tea and slipped the brunette a second cup. "Visiting Daddy Dearest is always a pain, what with all of the transfers I have to make."

"That's too bad," the brunette drank her tea, listening to the older girl speak.

"Anyway, thank you for coming such a far way to visit me during gold week," she put her hand on top of the brunette's. "It means a lot to me Keiko."

The brunette, now identified as Keiko, smiled and blushed. "Are you sure that's okay to do here? Back home we have to worry about classmates and your mother seeing us, don't we have to worry about your dad here?" As she spoke, Keiko pulled her hand back.

"Oh, heavens no. We don't need to hide here. Dad knows and he's fine with it. I told you he would be," she grabbed Keiko's hand again. "So, did you break up with him yet?"

"Yuusuke…is a really sweet guy and I just can't do it without reason. He'd die if he knew I was leaving him for another person, let alone a girl," Keiko stared down at her reflection in her tea. "I need a reason to break up with him. I need him to do something…"

The black-haired girl nodded in understanding, "It's alright Keiko, take all the time you need. I haven't left mine yet either, though I don't really need to. He and I are only going out so no one will guess he's gay."

"Who is it, Dai-kun?" Keiko asked, identifying the girl.

"I forget his name," she sighed. "Come on, I told Dad we'd be home by sunset."

Keiko nodded and left with Dai, walking hand and hand with her.

---

**Moon:** Yes, I did research all of those numbers. Also, I based the maid café on my friend Kesshou's trip to Japan.

And I did have a good time at camp. Thank you for asking.


	4. Dance, Dance

**Moon: **Meep. Don't kill me for taking so long. I couldn't help it.

I very special thanks to Ryuuie for being a awesome beta reader!

Disclaimers of I own nothing and all that jazz.

--

Yuusuke growled as they pounded their way through the third mob of blood-thirsty demons in an hour. Apparently, the whole demon plane had sensed their arrival and it seemed that every demon wanted to be able to boast that they took down the great Team Urameshi.

Finally getting fed up with the random attacks, Yuusuke exercised some control over the other two teens. Being the demon lord, he did have some diplomatic control over his demon companions: Hiei and Shuuichi, however, he hardly used it.

"Hiei, use that third eye of yours and tell me the location of our next wave of attackers."

Hiei gave Yuusuke a 'if you ever say that to me again, I'll have your head' look and let his bandana unravel. Within minutes, he was able to give a set of coordinates.

"I don't want numbers, give me a time here!"

"They are about a mile away. It will be five minutes, tops." This eared Shuuichi a thankful look as the on-the-verge-of-being-pissed-off demon lord went on ahead to use his shotgun.

Shuuichi and Hiei stayed up, however. Hiei was busy gathering coordinates on the ever-moving Jiro.

After a while, Yuusuke came wondering back. Seeing the concentrating Hiei, the black-haired teen threw Shuuichi a confused look.

"He's looking for Jiro," Shuuichi informed the younger boy. "It will be sunset soon. Let's make camp." Upon saying this, the two teens began to collect wood for a fire.

"We need a fire circle to contain it." Shuuichi nodded to the suggestion and began to collect large rocks.

After a large pile of wood accumulated and a semi-circle was made with half a pile of rocks, Hiei replaced his bandana with a growl. "Jiro disappeared. We have to go back."

"Fuck," the curse escaped Yuusuke as he sat against a tree, watching his redhead friend work on the circle.

"Fuck," Shuuichi said as well. This earned him a 'what-the hell?' glance from Hiei and a 'I-can't-believe-it's-not-butter!' glance from Yuusuke. "What?"

Yuusuke continued to give him a dumb look as he crawled over and poked Shuuichi's cheek. "Since when do you curse?"

"Since I broke a nail moving these rocks," Shuuichi stated simply before going wide-eyed. He hadn't meant to say that. _Bad Shuuichi! Bad! _He mentally scolded.

"…You broke…a nail?" Yuusuke asked to clarify. Shuuichi only nodded. "Let me see your hand." Yuusuke clarified at Shuuichi's reluctance, "The rock might have broken your finger."

Shuuichi reached his hand out and Yuusuke took it. Yuusuke looked at the older boy's hand in his own for a moment before deciding that the finger wasn't broken, though the nail was falling off. Wait…

"Kurama…do you have a manicure?"

_BAD SHUUICHI! BAD!_

--

It was a rather warm day in the city as a raven-haired boy wondered down the black roads. The grass was still in that transformation from winter brown to summer green, not that there was a lot of grass to transform. Nor were there too many trees to grow their leaves again, Japan was just too crowded.

Instead of greenery, the teen only had a city landscape to survey. Shop fronts held everything from clothes to computers and manga and yes, even porn. From time to time, there would be a ramen shop or sake bar in the background with houses above them. The main street was too crowded though.

Yuusuke sighed as he wandered down the back roads of his city. His house reeked of alcohol, Keiko was in Tokyo visiting her sick aunt, Kuwabara was being held hostage by his enraged older sister over a poor report card, and Genkai had the door locked.

"_Kurama…do you have a manicure?"_

_Before Shuuichi could answer, Hiei got back on topic. "We'll have to go back home tomorrow and use Spirit World's trackers to find Jiro." _

"Wait," Yuusuke pulled away from Shuuichi. "We have to go back already?"

"He disappeared. There is no way to find him and plenty of ways to get sidetracked and attacked," Hiei took out his katana and began to polish it.

_Yuusuke sighed and sat back against his tree. He watched as Shuuichi finished the fire circle and arranged the wood for ignition. As soon as it was done, Hiei lit it and they had demon bird for dinner._

_And a two headed fish._

Yuusuke let out another sigh at the memory. He was supposed to still be in demon world, kicking ass. Instead he was wandering the streets, trying to find someone to pick a fight with.

"Kurama, maybe?" the raven-haired boy pondered. He hadn't been to see Shuuichi yet. Maybe he would have more luck there.

Deciding this would be more fun then roaming the streets, Yuusuke set off towards the good part of town.

--

Minamino Shiori in the kitchen was washing dishes when her son came to her with a request.

"Mother," Shuuichi put on the best look he could muster. To add to the effect, he picked up a plate and began to wash it. "Can I go visit Dai in Tokyo? I have money for the ferry ride and bus."

Shiori let out a small sigh of relief when she heard this. She had waited far too long for her son to get a girlfriend and it was a relief that he was this interested in her. She was not about to stand in the way of a good thing. "Of course, but for how long?"

"Her father offered me a spare room for two nights," Shuuichi smiled through his lie. In truth though, he had friends with spare rooms…and miniskirts.

"Alright, but I want you to call me when you get there." Shiori felt she could trust her son. He would go straight there and he wouldn't touch Dai, right? No, he wouldn't. He knew better then that. He had never caused trouble before and she was confident that he wouldn't start trouble now.

"Thanks so much Mother!" Shuuichi beamed a smile down at her and dried his hands before giving her a hug. In a flash, he had set down the white plate and gone upstairs to pack. He would be gone within the hour.

Shiori smiled to herself once more as she put away the dishes. Shuuichi left soon after asking and was on his way for about a half hour before Yuusuke came to the door.

"Konichiwa Yuusuke-kun," Shiori bowed.

"Konichiwa Minamino-san," Yuusuke bowed back. "Is Shuuichi home?"

"I'm afraid you just missed him. He is on his way to Tokyo to visit his girlfriend."

"Oh, I see." With a disappointed, but satisfied smile, Yuusuke turned to leave.

As the red door closed behind Yuusuke, a thought came to mind. What about that hidden compartment in Shuuichi's dresser?

Yuusuke watched as Shiori returned to the kitchen. Being as quiet as possible, Yuusuke opened the door again and let himself in. Shutting it as quietly as possible, Yuusuke crept upstairs and to his friend's room.

Upon entering, the smell of roses caught Yuusuke's nostrils. Accepting the scent, Yuusuke shut the door behind him and locked it. Satisfied that no one knew he was there, he made his way to the dresser.

Kneeling down, he pulled open the bottom compartment, just as he had seen Shuuichi do.

"Wow…Kurama really is a pervert," Yuusuke muttered to himself as he looked upon the space filled with everything from panties to skirts to blouses to bras to make up.

There was even a curling iron and a kit for waxing your legs.

And a manicure set.

--

Shuuichi sat on the Japanese equivalent to the American Greyhound Bus. The ocean blue seats with green, aqua, and black stripes were all uniform. All of the overhead compartments were black, all of the floor lights were orange, and all of the windows were tinted.

Despite the lack of bright colors and light… and fun… Shuuichi still held a smirk firmly on his smug face. The redhead could hardly believe he was on his way to Tokyo to visit the new gay bar and dance club on opening night. He owed his friend Yuukou big time for offering him a place to stay while he partied.

Yuukou was a friend of his he had met at the park several months earlier. Shuuichi had approached the taller boy when he noticed he was in a skirt. It was Yuukou who had taken him shopping for his padded bra and pink shimmer lip-gloss. Yea sparkles!

It was also Yuukou who convinced him to wax his legs…among other places. It was also Yuukou's suggestion to pretend like he was visiting Dai.

It was a good thing Jiro had disappeared; otherwise he'd still have to be working instead of partying with his new lime green mini. Sure, he only had nine nails, but that's okay. As long as he was grinding some hot guy on the dance floor, he didn't care.

Too bad Yuusuke wouldn't be there. He'd be fun to grind.

--

Dai crept through her Father's small apartment, mindful of the used cigarettes and beer bottles on the floor. She had just gotten word from an old friend that a new gay bar was opening up. Apparently, as Yuukou said, it was for gays and lesbians. Upon getting word of such a place, Dai had resolved to take Keiko there for a night of dancing.

"Hun, wake up," Dai nudged Keiko gently. Keiko had been sleeping in Dai's room while Dai had taken the couch. Her father had left hours ago, but it was still early.

"Nyaaa?" Keiko questioned as she rubbed sleep from her eyes. Looking around, the brunette took in the pale pink walls that surrounded her.

"We're going shopping, you need a new outfit for tonight," Dai informed as she pulled out an outfit for herself from the closet. "We're both getting new things, my treat."

"What's tonight?" Keiko murmured, reaching for her bag.

The raven-haired teen smiled knowingly. "Nope, I'm not telling you. You'll start up, 'oh Dai-kun, I don't want to go.' Then I'll have to spend the whole day convincing you to go and we'll go and end up having a fun time and I will have wasted a whole shopping day convincing you to go!"

Keiko blinked at the older girl for a moment. "Oh."

"That's why I'm not telling you. Now get ready. We can get breakfast on the way to the mall," Dai ran a brush through her hair before ducking into the bathroom to change.

"You sound overly complicated and confused," Keiko continued as she regained some more consciousness, "but as long as you're buying, I'm getting new shoes and a halter top!"

"That's the spirit." Dai reentered the room in a black skirt and a black V-neck. The V-neck clung to her skin, enhancing her hourglass figure. Her hair had been pulled into a high ponytail. She kneeled down to look at a makeup mirror as she applied eyeliner.

"I'll buy you new earrings and a haircut too," she offered. Keiko, in turn, got a giant grin on her face before pulling out blue corduroys and a powder pink top. "Here," Dai handed Keiko a bag of her make up. "You'll look good in some; you've got such a pretty complexion."

With a nod, Keiko began to put on some lipstick and blush over a light power foundation.

A few minutes later, the pair were on their way out the door.

--

**Moon: **Oh, one more thing I would like to say before I wrap this up.

I never intended to include that last scene with Dai in Keiko in this chapter. That was a whole other game all together, but it fit nicely, no? Yes, it was a stretch, but it works.

So what did you think? I can't wait to hear from you guys!


	5. Big Smile

**Moon: **Sorry this took so long. I really don't know what held me up. I don't like this chapter. At all. 

I own nothing. Thanks Ryuuie for the proofreading, as always.

---

Mr. Miyagi woke for the third time that night. Normally, he wouldn't be bothered by this, however tonight was different.

You see, normally Mr. Miyagi was an insomniac. He was used to sitting up in his bed for hours at a time, praying for sleep. A few weeks ago, his doctor gave him an experimental sleep aid that worked surprisingly well. The only problem he really had with this was the massive migraines it would occasionally cause. Though, those could also be blamed by his nagging wife and verbally abusive boss.

Mr. Miyagi was distracted from his thoughts as his wife rolled over next to him. She let out one snore and a grunt before hugging her pillow and falling back asleep with her back turned to him. This only made him more aware of the blaring music and flashing lights coming from the other side of his bedroom window.

They were going to have to move for him to get any sleep… you know, with the new gay bar dance club and all.

Most of the people in the central Tokyo area— the ones in apartments and such— felt this way. Some of them were heavily medicated or too drunk or high to care. Then there were the dancers themselves.

"Save it for when we get in," Yuukou said between laughs as he watched Shuuichi dance around the sidewalk. Shuuichi, though, didn't pay attention to his companion as he proceeded to bump and grind Yuukou. This was only fun and games, but it earned the pair strange looks from those around them. One guy— Mello, as he became known— joined Shuuichi in his fun.

Yuukou continued to laugh as the two danced around him. As Shuuichi danced, he was really able to appreciate his female figure. The lime green pleated mini fit his waste perfectly, clinging to his skin. His pink v-neck clung to his abdomen, giving him a smooth look. The pink v-neck was actually a size too big; it went down to meet the green mini, as to not show any skin. The two seemingly became one as little bunches of fabric formed where Shuuichi was bending during his dancing.

Shuuichi's clothes weren't the only things Yuukou, or any of the other people there, could take notice to. Shuuichi's legs were waxed, courtesy of the seemingly sadistic Yuukou. His pale legs were clad with fish nets that went into high-top, black leather chunk-heal boots. They were laced with pink laces.

Shuuichi also sported a new hair style. Yuukou had dyed his hair black, though it was temporary and would wash out with a special shampoo. It was also curled with loose, cork-screw curls. Most of the massive mess of curls was up in a pony tail, while Shuuichi's bangs and a few curls stuck out.

To top it all off, the teen had on a padded bra and make-up. His eyes sported a light purple-pink eye shadow and black eyeliner. He had light blush on as well, with a thin coat of white powder covering his face and his neck. His eyebrows were also colored. As were his nails. Every other nail was black, and the others were lime green.

Shuuichi wasn't the only looker though. Mello took quick notice of Yuukou, who wore a black button-up blouse (with a padded bra, of course.) Yuukou also had a red-and-black, loose female tie hanging down from his collar. The shirt was not tucked into a red plaid, mid-thigh-length pleated skirt. Over the shirt and at the waist, one black leather belt clung with a silver clasp while one was held at the hip and hung down to the opposite side of the hem of the skirt.

As Mello's eyes traveled down, he could tell that Yuukou's legs were also waxed, but they sported no sort of fish net or stalking. Instead, Yuukou sported knee-length, lace-up, black leather boots with chunk heels. The laces were red.

Traveling back up lead him to crimped black hair, half up and half covering a powdered face. Yuukou's eyes had light red eye shadow and black eyeliner, his cheeks were rosy, and his lips were like a red rose. His eyebrows were plucked to be a perfect one-and-a-half inches apart with flawless arches. His nails were black and red.

Mello wasn't too bad looking, himself. He was in a long-sleeve, Cheshire cat striped shirt. The sleeves were longer then his arms, giving it a bell effect around his hands. Mello was also in a black, mid-thigh straight skirt. His legs weren't waxed, but they were covered with grey tights. He wore black ankle-high chunk heal boots. They did not lace up, but slipped on easily.

Over Mello's shirt, there was a gay pride rainbow belt. This was his only accessory though, as he had no padded bra on. He also had on minimal make-up; simple shiny lip gloss and eyeliner were about it. His black hair was down to about his shoulders. His thin figure all but made up for his lack of glamorous showings, though. The shadows created from the curves in his body and bone structure made him look gorgeous in the party lights.

"Oo! Stop dancing, you guys," Yuukou ordered after about ten minutes of watching the two skip around. "The line is moving." Yuukou only succeeded, though, in getting the two to dance in the general direction of the club.

"Yuukou—," Shuuichi pulled each vowel sound out like a music note. "Yuukou! Will you get me drunk tonight?" He pouted up to the taller boy. "This is my first time at a club, after all. Please?" Shuuichi also dragged the "ea" in "please" out.

"Sure, but stick to cheap stuff, ne?" Yuukou smiled down at the grinning boy and then looked over to Mello. "What about you?"

Mello's lips curled into a smirk at the question. In one fluid movement, he pulled his wallet out and flipped it open to show a shiny gold card with a series of numbers on it. He had a fake ID next to it. "My father's," he elaborated. This earned him a laugh and a head ruffle from Yuukou.

Shuuichi smiled and clapped Yuukou on the back. He had finally stopped dancing and was actually panting a little. He had found that the senseless dancing in the street only to only hinder his senses. If he were to be attacked while dancing in the street… well… he would not be on guard and would probably flinch with flawed reflexes.

That wasn't to leave his head.

Shuuichi was pulled from his thoughts as he made it to the door. He showed his fake ID to get in. Already, a large portion of the crowd had been driven away by the twenty-one and over sign. This made the redhead wonder just how old the whole room was. He knew Yuukou was legal and that Mello wasn't, but he wasn't sure about anything else.

Yuukou smiled as he spotted Shuuichi back in thought. "He doesn't belong here, I think. He belongs in the front of a classroom," he noted to Mello, who nodded in agreement.

"Very scholar-like."

"BOO!"

"AH!"

Yuukou laughed as Shuuichi cried in alarm to Mello's antics. "Alright, you two. Keep acting like a couple and no one will want to dance with you." The two promptly jumped apart. Shuuichi began wandering into the crowd, where he found a few people to grind with. Mello had taken to the bar early.

As time passed, the room quickly filled up with smoke of all sorts. The dry ice kind, the cigarette kind, and possibly the illegal kind were just a few that overtook the dancer's lungs. That wasn't all, though; Shuuichi was quick to notice the heavy-set bouncer guys. He also noticed the clear split in the room. All of the lesbians were on one side, while all of the gay men were on the other. The bar, however, was not split.

The redhead made his way over after digging through the crowd and loud music to find Yuukou. "Beer." He demanded it of Yuukou like his life depended on it. Yuukou could only chuckle as he bought two beers, one for Shuuichi and one for himself. Within ten minutes and two drinking games, they, as well as everyone else at the bar, had finished seven beers apiece. They were quickly cut off after one of the other people in the game tried to jump the counter and drink straight from the tap.

"Drunk yet?" Yuukou asked Shuuichi. Yuukou, himself, had a high tolerance, seeing as how he was twenty-five and all. He had been drinking far too long for a measly seven beers to take him down. He needed at least eight… and a half.

Shuuichi looked at Yuukou for a moment. His eyes were wide, and he had a large smile plastered on his face. "No!" This statement was quickly proven false as he began to laugh at all the pretty lights.

"Or, maybe he's high," Mello appeared over one of Yuukou's shoulders. "I mean, heaven only knows what this smoke is." Yuukou nodded in agreement before he turned his attention back to Shuuichi.

Shuuichi was looking around attentively, or as attentively as a dunk minor can. "Oh! I see someone I know!" His exclamation drew the attention of everyone else at the bar.

"Kurama?" a brunette asked him from behind her margarita.

"Kurama?" a raven hair girl asked next to the brunette.

"Keiko?" Shuuichi smiled. "Konbanwa!"

"Keiko?" The raven haired girl addressed the brunette. "Who's Kurama? Don't you mean Shuuichi?"

"Hi, Dai!" Shuuichi chirped happily.

"Kurama?" Keiko was now as confused as Dai. "How do you know Dai?"

"How do I know Dai? How do you know Dai?" Shuuichi asked, stealing a sip of her margarita.

"How do you two know each other?" Dai was wide-eyed in confusion.

Yuukou and Mello looked on in fascination. They let the series of questions continue for a few minutes before Mello stepped in. "One at a time, understood?" The three nodded in obedience. "Now, Shuuichi, state your name and relation to both of these girls."

"Minamino 'Kurama' Shuuichi. Keiko is my crush's girlfriend. Dai is my fake girlfriend."

"Alright, and now you." Mello pointed to Keiko.

"Yukimura Keiko. Kurama is my fake boyfriend's best friend. Dai is my lover."

"Alright. And finally…" Mello trailed off, pointing to Dai.

"Hotaru Dai. Keiko is my lover. Shuuichi is my fake boyfriend."

Silence.

Yuukou tugged on Mello's sleeve, muttering something about awkward situations and not getting involved. Mello nodded and quickly followed Yuukou back to the dance floor.

Keiko watched the two leave, her mind confused and littered with questions. "Wait…You have a crush on Yuusuke? You're _gay_?" Shuuichi could only nod with the same large smile plastered across his face.

"Yeah! Yeah! Speaking of which, guess what?" Shuuichi began to giggle uncontrollably until Dai finally asked what was so funny. "Yuusuke has my panties and he thinks they're Dai's!" He burst into full laughter now.

The two girls looked at him like he was insane until Dai also burst into laughter. "Shuuichi, I love you now."

"But I'm gay."

"Go dance," Dai commanded of him. Without hesitation, Shuuichi did as told. Dai's smile grew as big as the Cheshire cat's.

Keiko looked at her confused. "What's so funny, Dai-kun?"

"I have the perfect excuse." Dai sipped at her drink. "Finish your margarita, Keiko. You have a long day tomorrow."

---

**Moon: **I told you I hated it, but please don't flame. I was actually going to put the first scene of the next chapter at the end of this one, but with school two days away and an update being needed…yeah.

* * *

Return to Top 


	6. Blood Lust

Dear reader,

They who correctly identify/notice my fishy humor get a prize.

Thanks to Ryuuie for proofing TEN PAGES AND ONE LINE! Was the length worth the wait you guys? We still have a few chapters to go OMG: D

Love,

Moon Minamino

I own nothing. Lyrics to Orenji no Taiyou found at: h t t p / w w w . a n g e l f i r e . c o m / g e e k / t e t r i s n o m i k o / s a i n t o f c o o l / o r a n g e . h t m l

Sakanaya Park was a peaceful place. Filled with luscious green grass and blooming Sakura trees, it was one of the most popular cherry blossom viewing spots in town. The birds were always chirping as squirrels ran from tree to tree causing havoc; kids would play in the jungle gym's sandbox while parents conversed over the daily headlines in the newspaper.

There was a pond always filled with ducks. The water was as clear as overpriced French mineral water which was sold at a vender's cart a few meters away. The smell of fresh baked dumplings and tako on a stick filled the air while teens went for the sweeter crepes also sold in the park near the pond.

Fishing wasn't allowed.

Too bad it was still winter.

The news had said the winter weather would clear into summer faster then it had been clearing in the past week. The news was notorious for lies.

Sakanaya Park was an empty place. Patches of melting snow dotted the brown, soggy grass. The Sakura trees were weighed down with snow, with no green popping through. The sound of emptiness filled the air as a squirrel scavenged for that one last nut. The jungle gym was empty, too, covered in ice. The sandbox was mushy in the spots where the snow had already melted. The neglected lid lay four feet away.

The pond was also frozen over in most spots; a goose swam in the cold water that had melted already. There were no food carts around, the air smelled of oak and ash. The smoky smell that comes with all snow was clearing, slowly but surely.

Despite these less-than-satisfactory conditions, two teens walked through the park. It was the last day of Gold Week and the memories of the dancing were just that-memories. Tokyo was a world away and everyone was back at home, procrastinating on those last few math problems.

A dark-haired boy walked with his arms folded behind his head, his elbows stuck up in the air. As he walked he stopped and lifted his right foot and pushed his toes down against the ground. A small crack could be heard before he took a step forward and repeated this action with his left foot.

"I wish you wouldn't do that Yuusuke," a brunette girl said, bringing her hand up to her mouth and turning her head to look away from the boy. "I hate that sound."

Yuusuke smirked and put his arms in front of him before lacing his fingers together and straightening his elbows. More little pops could be heard coming from his fingers.

"Yuusuke!" the girl swung her bag to hit the boy in the jaw. "Stop!"

"Ah, Keiko, I'm just messin' with ya." Yuusuke ducked and stood once the bag had safely passed overhead. "You don't have to get violent."

With a sigh, Keiko nodded. "You're right; I don't need to get violent." She looked down and removed her hand from her mouth, carrying her bag with both hands in front of her. The brown leather bag bumped against her knees gently as she walked.

"Wha-?" Yuusuke stayed put, looking at the spot where Keiko once stood. Shaking his head he jogged to catch up with her. "What do you mean I'm right? Since when am I right? And since when don't you love hitting me with that evil little bag of yours?"

Keiko ignored him and continued walking down the snow-laden path with her companion. She looked at her feet as she walked; a childhood habit she had never been able to break. She carefully noted the detail of her slip-on dress shoes as she rehearsed what she would say to the other over and over in her mind.

Yuusuke, I'm sorry but…

Yuusuke, there's someone else…

You're gone so much that I don't think we…

I'd rather be single…

Yuusuke, I'm a lesbian…

"Yuusuke…" Keiko's voice was soft as she spoke. She tried to cover her eyes nonchalantly but failed.

The raven-haired teen looked at the shorter girl. "Yeah? What's up?"

I can't.

"Never mind," she said after a long pause. She looked up to the sky, wishing there was more sunlight. Maybe a sunny day would help her make this decision.

Yuusuke, I'm cheating on you…

Yuusuke, we go to different schools…

Your future isn't set…

Yuusuke nodded and took in a deep breath of cold air. "Why does it always smell like smoke whenever it snows?"

I have to.

"Yuusuke, I know you're cheating on me." Keiko came to a stop and looked down at the ground, hiding her face behind her bangs.

Yuusuke came to a stop and stared at Keiko. "What are you talking about? I've been loyal for the past two years."

Every thought that could pushed its way through Keiko's head. Thoughts about how Yuusuke had been loyal and about how he didn't pressure her for things as long as he was free to look on the internet passed her by. Thoughts about how he forgot an anniversary here and there but always made it up to her with some pendant or a bouquet of flowers or some other splendid gift that she would have never thought of getting.

The thought that stood out most in her mind was the memory of last Obon when Yuusuke had gotten a job and saved his money to buy her a really expensive white yukata covered in sakura petals with a matching obi. She had worn that thing for two days straight and slept in it for a month before she began to worry about damaging it. Keiko loved that thing. Yuusuke really was a closet romantic.

Other thoughts also pushed inside of her. She was accusing Yuusuke of cheating when she was the one cheating. She was about to pan something that she had done off on him. He had given her nothing but trust and she was breaking it.

"Ye-yes, you have been cheating. I f-found the panties you keep in your coat pocket. I don't we-wear lacey pink and white panties." As she said this, Keiko tried her best to keep a steady voice and not cry. She really was horrible. She knew it and she wished he knew it too.

Just take the defeat, Yuusuke…

I'm terrible, smack me and go…

It's my fault!

Yuusuke stopped walking and was silent. "Those… I don't… Shuuichi gave them to me…" That realization hit Yuusuke like a ton of bricks. Shuuichi gave him the panties which were making Keiko suspicious.

"I don't care how you got them…I can't date a pervert!" Keiko shouted at him. Tears pushed out of her brown eyes as she stared into Yuusuke's.

Yuusuke shook his head no, "No. No. No. You can't break up with me over this! Please don't. You wouldn't… You're better than this."

"It's OVER!" She screamed at him before turning and running back to the park entrance.

Yuusuke looked as she ran from him. "Kurama gave me those…" he murmured to himself. _She just broke up with me because of Kurama. I didn't do anything wrong. I didn't…_

It started to snow as a lone tear escaped his eyes. The season change was late. The winter was lasting a good four weeks longer than it was supposed to.

Sakanaya Park was a beautiful place in the summer. Birds chirped, children played, teens dated, and parents conversed. It was the best place in the town for cherry blossom viewing and it was the most popular place to watch fireworks on Obon.

Sakanaya Park wasn't so beautiful in the winter. The deathly silence drove away most people out for a romantic walk in the snow. The trees were bare. The dirt wasn't covered from the eye's gaze by luscious green grass. It was barren and deserted.

One teen stood in the park. He was a short boy of sixteen with slicked-back raven hair. His eyes were the color of chocolate and his skin was pale. He had a build of a street fighter or martial artist. His name was Urameshi Yuusuke and he had just been dumped by Yukimura Keiko, his girlfriend of two years.

He did.

--

Shuuichi looked around the bathroom, his body submerged up to the top of his upper lip in the green-blue bath water. Green eyes met blue tile and white washed walls. The shower hose hung down over the drain next to the little wooden stool used for bathing.

A rubber ducky floated past.

Shuuichi sat straight up in the deep ofuro cedar tub. His thin, yet well-defined body disrupted the steam coming from the top of the bath. A thin hand with finely manicured fingernails reached down and picked up the duck, squeezing it until an old squeaker made a quacking sound. With age, however, the quack had become more of a wheeze. A smile crossed the redhead's lips.

Some may say that it was childish for a seventeen-, soon to be eighteen-year-old to bathe with a little yellow rubber duck, but he didn't care. His mom had often played with him and the duck at bath time when he was little. The faint memory of bathing with his biological father at the age of three brought long forgotten memories of the car crash. After that he had to bathe with his mom instead. Just as any other three-year-old boy who wanted to be just like their father, Shuuichi hadn't been fond of bathing with her. She bought him the duck to calm him down.

Shuuichi squeaked the duck again and dunked his head under the water to wet his hair in order to make it easier to comb when he got out. He tossed the old yellow duck into his bathing bucket and added his rose-scented shampoo and conditioner to it as well. He topped the wooden bucket with his wash cloth. Standing on the stool and cursing his lack of height, he put the bucket on the top shelf next to his mom's. He was granted first bath in the house, followed by his mother, because he was the oldest man within the family. Normally, his dad would have first bath, but since his mom had remarried, his stepfather was not an original family member by Shiori's standards. She loved him, but she still recognized the fact that he was her second husband.

_A good way to remember father, I suppose, _Shuuichi thought, wrapping up in a towel and walking down the plush-carpeted hallway to his room. He kneeled down in front of his mirror and grabbed a brush from his bedside stand. He combed his hair out before using a large hair clip to tie up his red mane to the back of his head. He dried his face and stood up, pulling on some panties and red pajama pants with little kitties from Trigun all over it. He pulled a grey hoody over his head, dislodging his hair clip a bit.

Looking around, Shuuichi sought to lay out a uniform for the next day. When when he found none of the ugly pink material in his closet, he went down past the living room and through the kitchen to access the laundry room. Shaking out a large sheet from the dryer, he began to fold the laundry, humming one of his favorite songs while doing so—Gackt and Hyde's _Orenji no Taiyou. _

"_Yuugure ni kimi to mita orenji no taiyou  
Nakisou na kao o shite eien no sayonara" _

At dusk, I beheld the orange sun with you.  
With a teary face, you bid an eternal farewell.

He sang aloud, graduating from humming to words. The redhead's light voice floated into the kitchen softly. It was quiet but it was on key.

A sigh could barely be heard over the singing. A middle-aged man with brown hair and wrinkles was kneeling at the low table with his legs under the blanket heated by the seasonal electric heater that was placed under the table each year. A pair of glasses and a shallow, rounded glass of sake sat next to a stack of paperwork for his hospital.

The man closed his eyes and listened to his stepson sing.

"_Akireru hodo kimi o omou yo  
Sore dake de boku wa mitasareru  
Nakanai de, itsu date aeru yo  
Hitomi o tojireba..." _

I can't love you any more than I do.  
And just by that, I feel complete.  
So don't cry, we can always meet again.  
Whenever we close our eyes...

Thinking back, Shiori's second husband Hiroto remembered that he couldn't wait to marry his bride. He was so excited to have his son Shuuichi have an older boy, coincidently with the same name, to look up to and learn from.

It had been almost two years, though, and things had changed. Getting to know the older Shuuichi more was difficult. He often left at a whim without a word and wouldn't return for days on end. When he had confronted Shiori, she had just said that it had been happening for a year already and he always came home safely. That was all she cared about. But Hiroto just couldn't trust that.

As more time went on, Shuuichi started to disappear less and less. He would try to spend time with his stepson, but Shuuichi would often make excuses. He would say things like "I would but I have homework" or "I have chores and a book I need to finish." Of course these were lies. The boy never brought home more than two books from school, both usually being outside reading books or manga. Once or twice, it was a magazine.

Despite the lies, he had let his stepson do as he pleased without question, thus, ultimately failing to create a relationship with the boy.

Ever since he had taken up that government job, he had been able to stay home from the hospital more during the day. This allotted more time to his sons and more time to observe them.

The older Shuuichi seemed to hate him. He detested the presence of another man in the house, which was understandable since he had been the only man for almost fifteen years. It was hard to let others into your life after only having a mom for that long. He thought that over time, the teen would come to accept him and ease up around him, but he was wrong.

Running into him on the way out, Shuuichi would act like he had just been caught killing someone. Maybe it was because he had questioned the teen so much about his disappearances, or maybe the redhead hated leaving his mother home with him. Either way, it didn't matter. It was typical for a teen to be tense when caught going out.

More time passed, and he had observed many other things about the older Shuuichi. The way he walked, talked, the sound of his voice, his diction, his clothes, his hair---(Hell, his hair stuck out the most.)---were off. They were feminine.

Assuming it was an aftereffect of growing up without a father, he let it slide. He thought having another man, hell, two other men if you counted his biological son little Shuuichi, that older Shuuichi would grow out of his phase and into a strapping young man. He had seen Shuuichi without a shirt on a hot day, and he was toned and had a well-defined body, just like any manly man. The fact that the redhead had been in the garden at the time didn't even occur to him.

As time went by, it was clear that Shuuichi wasn't growing out of his phase; he was growing into it. He was becoming thinner, leaner. He was getting more graceful, gliding across the floor with ease and confidence. He was sure that if Shuuichi had been in a kimono, he would have given the illusion of floating, just as a geisha would.

He was a little relieved when Shuuichi started dating that Dai girl, though his lack of enthusiasm clearly showed. Hell, he was happy when Shuuichi went to visit her not a week ago in Tokyo, though he was a bit deterred when Dai had visited that morning.

"_Mr. Minamino?" Dai's black hair was pulled back into a tight bun with a waterfall-like center. _

"Actually, I married into the family," he responded, shrugging off the "Minamino."

"_Ah, gomen, Sakana-san." She used a filler, not asking his name. "Is Shuuichi-kun here?" _

"I'm sorry, but he's sleeping. Can I give him a message for you?" He frowned, leaning on the door frame and wiping his glasses with a handkerchief in his back pocket.

Dai thought for a moment before nodding. "Yes." She looked down at her feet. She seemed to inspect a rose growing next to the steps, contemplating what she was about to say. "Tell him we're over. Just…rip up my number. I don't want to talk. It's done."

Needless to say, he was still taken aback, thinking about what Dai had said to him. She had left shortly after that, bowing goodbye and picking the rose by her feet. He had gone in and woken Shuuichi up with the news, but Shuuichi had just shrugged it off. It didn't bother him one bit. He went back to sleep shortly after.

He thought that maybe Shuuichi was too tired to comprehend the news or that maybe he was in denial. He really leaned towards the denial theory when Shuuichi had woken up with a smile and gone in for his bath. Now that he was singing in the laundry room he just seemed so cheerful despite the words in the song.

"Shuuichi?" he asked, pouring himself more sake.

The redhead poked his head out the door. "Mmm? Nan desu ka? What is it?" He looked at his step father with big, round green eyes full of life and happiness.

"Are you okay? I mean..." he sighed. All other attempts to get through to him hadn't worked, but this one could. "...About Dai…"

"I'm fine, really. I expected it to happen sooner or later," Shuuichi said nonchalantly while letting his hair down and sticking the clip in his mouth. He flipped his head upside down and put his hands around his hair as if he were about to put it into a ponytail. Instead of putting a tie around it, he twisted it and put the clip back in

He sighed, "Shuuichi, you can't stay in denial about this. She was your first girlfriend."

"I know." He put his head back up with his hair back. "I'm not in denial about it, though. We've been talking about this for some time. It's really no surprise."

In truth, they had been talking about it for a long time. The plan was that Dai would break up with him as soon as she was able to bag the girl she had been chasing.

"I wonder who that girl is…" Shuuichi inwardly wondered, ignoring the fact that his stepfather had started talking again.

"Shuuichi…SHUUICHI!" Hiroto shouted.

"Ah, sorry. I was distracted. What did you say?"

"Do you know why she decided to break up with you?" He sighed and pulled out a carton of cigarettes. He lit it up and breathed in deeply.

Shuuichi thought for a moment. _Because I'm gay and she's a lesbian. _"Because she realized I was more than just long red hair and a good grade point average. You know how those girls at school are. They've chased me home more than once."

Hiroto let out his drag, a big puff of smoke spilling Shuuichi's way. He nodded. "What didn't she like about you?"

_That I have a dick. _He inwardly smiled at his mind's commentary. "She just didn't like me. I can't explain it. Maybe you can just call her fickle? I don't know."

Hiroto nodded again. "There were girls like that in my school, as well. I got dumped multiple times for no apparent or plausible reason."

_I'm sure there was a plausible reason for any number of girls to dump you. _"I'm sorry to hear that. Ah-" A buzzer went off. "The wash I put in is done." He retreated back into the laundry room and finished folding what was in the dryer before putting the sopping wet load of whites into the dryer. He was risking this, but he needed to get the vomit out of his blouse and skirt. He had been so drunk that he had gotten sick, and he didn't remember anything about that night, just that he had woken up between some dude named Mell and his good friend Yuukou. Apparently and thankfully, nothing had happened, according to the sober Yuukou.

Shuuichi looked through the wet mass of clothes as he put them into the dryer. _Where are my pink and white lacey…Yuusuke! _The redhead realized. He remembered back to when he had given his friend his panties. A small smiled crossed his rose petal lips.

"_Kirameku nami to tawamureteita mujaki na kimi no sono yokogao  
Hadashi de sunahama o kakenukeru kimi ga itoshii" _

I watched your innocent face as you frolicked with the waves.  
Running along the beach with your bare feet, you are so precious to me.

He started to sing again, setting the dryer for ninety minutes. He took the basket full of folded cloths into his arms, letting one arm dangle while the other arm supported the basket against his side, much like a mother would do with her laundry while holding her child. He padded upstairs through the carpeted hall and into the square room.

"_Suna ni kaita kimi no namae to kazari tsuketa kaigara wa  
Kata o yoseta bokura no mae de nami ni sarawareta" _

I carved your name in the sand and decorated it with shells.  
Nuzzled together behind it, we watched as the waves washed it away.

He sang more as he put his clothes in his cedar dresser.

--

Yuusuke huffed, walking down the street. He didn't want to be angry at his friend and had attempted to take his anger out on some thugs in the slums of their small town. In other words, he had gone back to his apartment complex and taken a walk, waiting to see who would attack.

The first gang had been from the high school neighboring his. It was weird, being in high school. He was already in his second year and would graduate next year. Kurama was graduating this year.

Oh yeah, Kurama.

The first gang had been from a high school neighboring his. All Yuusuke had to do was imagine each person in the five-member posse with red hair, and they all went down with a flick of his wrist.

The second gang was a bunch of drug dealers, thinking Yuusuke was out roaming to steal their clients. He kicked their asses when they offered him weed, a type of plant.

The third was a bunch of drunkards, probably his mom's friends, who wanted some money for liquor and maybe some acid shots. He didn't have any on him, and one of them was wearing a rose in his shirt. They were down before Yuusuke could let off enough steam to even get a fraction of his frustration out.

There was no fourth gang. Instead, there was just Kuwabara. He came up to Yuusuke cheerfully. When Yuusuke hadn't high-fived him, Kuwabara had started asking questions. Finally annoyed to death with his friend's repulsive nature, though everything was repulsive to Yuusuke at this point, Yuusuke beat the shit out of him before taking off for Kurama's house.

Kurama who lived in a house, not an apartment.

Kurama who had a sober mom and a stepdad.

Kurama who had a little brother.

Kurama who had the perfect grade point average.

Kurama who all the girls were after.

Kurama who had made the love of his life break up with him.

Yuusuke's walk quickened as he hurriedly weaved his way through the neighborhood's streets. He avoided the walk-around police officer, Mr. Sakana. He found his friend's house and came to a stop infront of it.

It had lush green grass and a small tree growing in front of it. It was brick with some off-white siding near the top.

Looking at it, Yuusuke counted the windows, trying to calm down. He saw the redhead in his room, smiling, putting away clothing. He picked up an empty laundry basket and disappeared from view.

That smile mocked him.

Yuusuke jogged to the back entrance that led directly to the kitchen. He stared in the back door's window. He saw Kurama's stepfather looking over documents and drinking sake.

Shuuichi saw Yuusuke looking in the back door as he emerged into the kitchen entrance from the living room. _He looks angry…_ Shuuichi gave him a smile and motioned for him to come in.

Yuusuke did come in. He charged in, almost taking the door with him. He rushed over to Shuuichi and took him by his collar, causing him to drop his empty laundry basket. Pushed against the wall, Shuuichi took Yuusuke's wrists. "What are you doing?" he shouted. His stepdad had gotten up and was about to jump Yuusuke.

"She left me," he pushed Shuuichi up the wall with force. "She left me and it's all your fault!" Tears began to flow from his eyes and his grip tightened. "I'll kill you!"

Shuuichi's stepfather started to push on Yuusuke, trying to move him.

"I'LL KILL YOU!" He yelled again.


	7. Laundry Sucks

**Moon: **I realize you guys waited forever for this and I apologize. I literly had a paper for every class due, which wouldn't have been so bad if one of those papers wasn't science fair. I about died. But in the end I got a 195/200 on it. There was one kid in my class who got a 30/200. Wow.

Anyway after my bought of papers, I had a cold that wouldn't go away. That made me unable to function well for about a week and a half. It would have been longer but I started snortin' this nose gell stuff and as soon as I started it my nose cleared up and two days later all of my symptoms were gone.

And then I just felt like being lazy for a week because I had worked so hard.

Then I was talking to my muse, Shisou and decided I need to write. Then it say in Ryuu's inbox for a week before it was proof read. HEH! I win.

Thanks proof reader Ryuuiechan, thanks muse shisou for staying up to all hours of the night with me while I wrote, thanks readers, etc.

I do not own any of this yeah sure whatever.

Outside the Minamino household there was a little baby bird that had fallen from its nest. It really should not have hatched yet, but the small being could only stay encased in its cage for so long; after all, it was suppose to be spring.

Snow still blanketed the ground, cushioning the bird's fall. Though the chick had escaped immediate death, it would freeze within the hour. Its young life would be cut short while its parents watched, unable to do anything.

Yeah, it was supposed to be spring.

The back door shook as Shuuichi kicked his friend off of him and against the door. "Calm down Yuusuke!" The redheaded teen found his long ankle-length jacket and put it on over his pajamas. Yuusuke glared as he put his shoes on. "Come on."

Yuusuke was pushed aside by his friend and glared as the redhead left the house. Shuuichi stared in at the raven-haired boy until he came out.

"What?" Yuusuke spat at the other.

"I don't know, you tell me," Shuuichi retorted and set off to walk down the driveway. Yuusuke shoved his hands in his pockets and treaded behind the older boy silently, a scowl on his downcast face. The pair turned and walked wordlessly down the street.

The raven-haired Yuusuke finally looked up and took a deep breath, a little more calm. It had only taken him a few blocks with the redhead to release his anger. A hand rubbed his slick, gelled hair back into place.

"Are you ready to tell me what that was about?" Shuuichi asked, looking over at Yuusuke.

Yuusuke stayed silent longer and didn't say anything for a few more blocks yet. He could feel Shuuichi's eyes bearing down at him, trying to see into his soul. "Keiko left me," he said abruptly, stopping in his tracks.

Shuuichi also stopped and stared at him for a moment before grasping his friend into a hug. Yuusuke started to break down a little in his arms, hugging back. He got himself to calm down before his sorrow really started to show. "I'm sorry," Shuuichi murmured. "What happened?"

Yuusuke pulled away from Shuuichi and started to walk again. Shuuichi followed and waited for Yuusuke to talk without being prodded. "She thought I was cheating on her…because of those panties you gave me."

Shuuichi remained silent before looking away. "I'm sorry."

"Man, Kurama, it's not your fault..." Shuuichi looked up at Yuusuke's statement. "How are things going with you and Dai?"

"She broke up with me a few hours ago… she found someone else…" Shuuichi smiled.

"You don't seem too broken up about it." Yuusuke kicked a rock down the semi-melted side walk.

"Yeah, well, it's not like we were together for years like you and Keiko. Besides… we were planning on it." Yuusuke stopped in his tracks and looked to Shuuichi, waiting to hear the rest of it. Shuuichi, however, would not say more.

"Shuuichi?" Yuusuke tried, but the older boy just turned and kept walking. Yuusuke, in turn, accompanied the redhead.

Yuusuke and Shuuichi walked down the urban side walk, making their way to the city. Shuuichi, being in only pajamas and a light jacket, was freezing. Yuusuke, noticing this, offered the other his jacket. Shuuichi took it happily.

Yuusuke did not try to make Shuuichi talk as they walked, allowing the other the luxury of silence, hoping that he would eventually choose to talk.

Shuuichi's thoughts were in turmoil. A war was being waged about whether or not he should come clean to his crush. To his friend.

On one hand, if he kept quiet, he would be secure in their friendship. He knew the other would not go anywhere and that they would always remain close, as long as his secret didn't spill. But he'd be living a lie.

Then, there was taking the plunge and the risk. Tell Yuusuke his feelings, tell him that women aren't his type, and risk loosing him as a friend. And even if he didn't loose Yuusuke as a friend, he knew Yuusuke was straight.

Shops, stores, and restaurants passed them as they walked. The black pavement clashed terribly with the grey concrete and the white crosswalk lines were dull and worn. A big pothole made a loud bumpy noise every time a car hit it.

Shuuichi's eye wandered to the shops as they passed. There was a Harajuku fashion shop. This week's color was evidently red. It went well with the Lolita store right next door. The black embraced the red. The darkness embraced the blood.

The sweet smell of plum rice balls filled the air as they passed a food shop. Shuuichi's memories immediately went to the times when he was a child. Back when his dad was alive, his mom would make sweet plum treats all the time. Plum was his father's favorite food, and his own as well. Every spring his mom would make plum rice balls and pack them into baskets. They would go cherry blossom viewing at Sakanaya Park. Shuuichi would crawl onto his dad's lap and get rice all over himself and his dad's kimono.

Shuuichi was snapped back into reality when a buzzing sound reached his ears. He looked across the street and saw a tattoo shop.

"Hey Yuusuke," he grabbed Yuusuke's hand and pulled him across the street. "I've got some money in my coat pocket… Let's get a tattoo."

Yuusuke, a bit dumb-struck at being dragged across the road, was a bit amazed at his friend. "We're not old enough… I don't have my fake ID…"

Shuuichi shook his head. "Come on, we'll make them do us…" He dragged Yuusuke inside. "What do you want to get?"

The raven haired boy cocked his head to the side a little, taking in the view of the room. The walls were a rich orange-brown color. The floor was hard wood and all of the detail work was in black, just like the black leather chairs and latex gloves. There were giant paintings on the wall, faces and caricatures. There was a fern in the corner. It reminded him of a coffee house.

"Yuusuke?" Yuusuke looked at Shuuichi. "I have a question…"

"Shoot."

Shuuichi felt foolish asking this, but at the moment he felt he needed reassurance. "You're my friend, right?"

Yuusuke raised an eyebrow. "Maybe your break up with Dai affected you more then you thought."

No. "Maybe…"

Yuusuke thought for a moment, "Let's get the kanji for kitchen tattooed on our biceps…" he grinned.

Shuuichi smiled. Kitchen, that was perfect. He had invited Yuusuke over one night when he was first figuring out his sexuality. They had rented MoonChild together and watched it, having a big laugh when the American walked into the bar with a new tattoo. The American was showing everyone, convinced it said ninja, when in reality, it said kitchen. The pair of them had laughed for the rest of the night, despite the sad ending to the movie. That night was the night Shuuichi's crush on Yuusuke had formed.

"Alright, that's perfect." Shuuichi walked to the counter and began his convincing performance. I am eighteen. I am eighteen. I _am _eighteen. The tattoo artist agreed to tattoo them. He sat Shuuichi down first and free handed the kanji on with a sharpie before starting the tattoo. Shuuichi had to wince at the needle poking at his skin. It didn't hurt, but it did sting. It was annoying and repetitive. Yuusuke place a hand on his shoulder to steady him.

Then it was Yuusuke's turn. Yuusuke screamed out in pain when the needle started, and Shuuichi couldn't help but giggle a little, hiding it behind his hand. He took the other's hand and let him squeeze it as the artist finished the tattoo up. Shuuichi paid, they got bandaged up, and they left.

"Shit, that hurt," Yuusuke groaned and rubbed his arm gently.

"You can take a headbutt from Chuu, but you can't get tattooed? Am I missing something?" Yuusuke glared at Shuuichi but the two continued to walk down the street, nonetheless.

Shuuichi led Yuusuke back across the street. The more he thought about it, the more he wanted a plum rice ball. His mom had stopped making plum treats after his dad had passed away.

"What now?" Yuusuke asked as he found himself being dragged back across the street.

"I want a plum rice ball. I'll buy you one too," Shuuichi said, looking ahead, focusing on the shop.

Yuusuke nodded and cracked his back. Shuuichi smiled. He loved the sound of bones popping. It reminded him of a good sparring match. It reminded him of Yuusuke.

The two entered the shop and a little bell on the door rang. They were greeted by a shop keeper and Shuuichi put the order in for a box of four plum rice balls. The shop keeper went about making them as the redhead sat against the beige wall in the brown chair. The floor was a white-grey tile. The food was behind some glass on a wooden base. The back wall was littered with photos of baseball players.

Yuusuke looked outside the glossy window. He saw girl after girl, couple after couple walking by. Everywhere he looked he was reminded of Keiko.

"Your food's ready." Yuusuke was snapped from his thought. Shuuichi got up and paid, taking the food. "Let's go to the park to eat this…" Yuusuke nodded and walked with Shuuichi, who was holding the box up at breast height.

They walked with each other. It began to snow. Shuuichi yawned and shrugged the jacket up higher. He hated the cold; it made him sleepy. Little white flakes settled in his hair.

Yuusuke looked to Shuuichi. "You look pathetic."

"Nyaaa," Shuuichi headbutted Yuusuke's shoulder gently, yawning again. Yuusuke shook his head and put an arm around him. It was just a friendly gesture, after all.

"You look sick…"

"I think I'm getting sick," Shuuichi had a weird smile on his face, "but that's okay."

Yuusuke gave him a look but quickly shook it off. "You were affected by your break up." Shuuichi decided to let Yuusuke think what he wanted as he laid his head on Yuusuke gently. They walked to Sakanaya Park and took a seat on a bench after Yuusuke pushed the freshly laid snow off.

Shuuichi sat up and pulled the jacket around him, opening the box and handing a rice ball to Yuusuke. Yuusuke's eyes wandered to the play set, neglected and forgotten by the children who would rather be warm inside then outside playing in the snow.

Shuuichi ate his rice ball quietly. Yuusuke looked at his for a moment before taking a nibble off the top of his own.

"This was my dad's favorite food…" Shuuichi tried. Yuusuke looked up at him quietly. He had never heard the other talk about his human father. "It's mine, too, but mom never makes them anymore… They remind her of dad. She doesn't want to remember him after being remarried."

Yuusuke finished off his first rice ball. "Why not?"

"She views it as cheating on her new husband… I hate him."

"I've never heard you speak of him so spitefully before."

Shuuichi finished his rice ball and handed Yuusuke a second one, taking the last for himself. "I'm feeling talkative tonight… Can I tell you something…?"

Yuusuke nodded, biting into the next rice ball.

"I…" Shuuichi stopped. He had always been a man of logic. His whole thought process was logic based. Everything he did was logical and yet… and yet, here he was, about to do something completely illogical. "You promise not to hate me? Not to judge me? Not to let anything change between us?" His hand immediately went to his bandaged arm.

"Yeah, why would I hate you? What's going on with you?" Yuusuke looked to his friend, a little worried about him. This was very un-Kurama-like.

"I'm…" He shook his head. "I can't."

"You're my friend, right?" Yuusuke asked calmly.

"Yes."

"Friends don't keep secrets."

Shuuichi nodded. "Well…" he bit his tongue. Could he do this? Yeah, he could. "I'm gay." There, he said it. Shuuichi felt an invisible weight lifted from his shoulders.

Yuusuke choked on his rice. It took him a moment to regain his composure from the shock of this sudden confession. "W-what!?"

"I'm gay," Shuuichi said again with a softer voice.

Yuusuke shook his head. "What the hell?!"

Now it was Shuuichi's turn to be taken aback. "Remember what you said… You won't hate me…"

"Fuck no," Yuusuke looked at Shuuichi in disgust. "Why the hell did you date Dai…" Yuusuke's eyes got wide. "Whose panties were those?"

Shuuichi was silent.

"Well?"

"…"

"WELL?"

"Mine…" Shuuichi's voice was soft and upset. He didn't have his rice ball anymore, it was on the ground.

Yuusuke stood up. "You're disgusting." He growled, ready to hit Shuuichi. Shuuichi in turn just stayed, looking down at the ground. Yuusuke lowered his hand. "Faggot." He left angrily.

Shuuichi sat there in the snow. He didn't notice as a few flakes landed on his eyelashes. He held back tears. Why had he done that? He was an idiot. An idiot. He had always relied on logic. As soon as he stopped relying on it, his best friend and crush leaves him.

A thundercloud rolled overhead. Shuuichi stood, still wearing Yuusuke's jacket. He walked back home, his head hung low. The rice ball box was left discarded in the snow, next to the fallen rice ball.

The sounds of the city seemed muffled to him. Nothing fully broke its way through his shell. Girls' giggling, friends' laughing, thunder rolling; it was all three worlds away. The sights and smells didn't even register in his brain as he mindlessly walked home.

He walked back to his home, stopping in the front yard. He looked down and saw the baby bird, flapping its wings helplessly; but like everything else that evening, it didn't register. He walked inside, unable to think of anything other than his best friend hating him.

He was quickly remedied of that.

"WHOSE PANTIES ARE THESE?"

Oh shit. The laundry.

**Moon**: Did you like it? I sure hope so. My new years resolution is to finish this story and start an original story. Oh, guess, what...wait. No. If I tell you and decide not to do it at the last second then you all will be sadses. Bye.


	8. Tainted Blood

**Moon: **This is late due to lack of inspiration and such. Also, school was killer and I'm a black belt now. That took a lot of time.

Thanks shisou for staying up with me to write this and thanks Ryuu for all the awsome stuff you do for me and this story.

Disclaimer: Dont won YYH.

The smell of plum filled the air as the door slammed, and a redheaded teenager was thrown from the third house on the left of the tiny suburban neighborhood. He landed in the snow with a plop, a threat about police being yelled after him. No one took much notice.

A few hours prior to the slam, Minamino Shiori descended the stairs in her tiny house in time to see her son and his dark-haired friend leave. She smiled gently and looked to her husband. "What happened?"

"I'm not sure. Shuuichi was doing his laundry and that Yuusuke boy barged in, angry." Shiori nodded, showing that she had heard her husband, before going to the counter. Shuuichi had been working hard in school lately and she had heard about Dai dumping him. Staring at the off-white countertop, Shiori decided that her son deserved something better than getting dumped. Thinking hard, she remembered him saying that plum was his favorite; so, she set off, working to make plum rice balls.

Looking up from his work, the husband asked, "What are you doing? I don't think I've ever seen you eat plum."

Shiori smiled softly. Her navy blue hair ran down her shoulders and into a very loose ponytail. She kept it back with a white strand of ribbon. Her brown eyes seemed to mimic her mouth's smile. Her flat face's perfect white skin gleamed in the light. She said with all the motherly love her face conveyed, "I haven't made plums for a very long time, but its Shuuichi's favorite."

"Why'd you stop?" His dark brown hair waved a little as he looked up from the table at his bride. He took off his reading glasses to get a better look at Shiori. Behind his glasses sat a pair of deep brown eyes, matching his hair. His pale-yellow skin showed the signs of age brought on by his strenuous job at the hospital. His face looked older then he really was.

"…I honestly don't remember." Shiori opened the rice cooker and poured in the rice before going to the ugly brown refrigerator and pulling out some plums.

The rice cooked, and Shiori added the plums. The sweet plum juice ran together with the rice, causing the rice to take on a plum-ish aroma. The steam raced through the house and drifted outside through an open window, cooling the hot kitchen.

"You said he was doing his laundry?"

"Yes." He replaced his glasses and went back to work. He spotted a flaw in his flannel shirt. He picked at the thread, pulling the yellow-white piece of string out further, making the cuff around his wrist tighten. Frowning, his delicate surgeon's hands unbuttoned and rolled the cuffs on both arms up to his elbows. It was hot in the kitchen anyway.

"Maybe I'll finish…" Shiori walked into the laundry room, the rice cooker spewing plum-rice steam into the air. She opened the drier and began folding. First it was shirts. She ironed his school uniforms. Shiori loved the pink with yellow trim. She noticed a button had fallen off, so she sat with her husband, to sew it back on.

Once Shuuichi's uniforms were clean, fixed up, and neatly folded in the powder blue laundry basket, she folded his dress shirts and trousers. She loved that her son loved to dress up. He always looked his best, rarely wearing jeans or sweats. The navy-haired woman wished her stepson was the same way, but he always insisted on jeans and plain t-shirts. He was always very sloppy.

Shiori had two neat stacks of clothes in the basket before reaching in for the last of Shuuichi's things, only to come out with some lacy panties. "Uhh…" She looked at them, at a complete loss for several minutes, before calling in her husband.

He came in and smiled at the panties. "When did you buy those?"

"I didn't." Shiori didn't even notice his suggestive tone.

"Oh…" He took the panties from her and pulled at them, much like a school boy would. "You don't think Shuuichi took these from Dai, do you?"

Shiori reached into the drier and emerged with a padded bra and a white blouse. "I don't think he could have gotten these from her…" She was at a loss. Her son was a pervert? Or worse? She prayed silently that he was just a pervert. Shiori couldn't imagine how devastated she would be if her son were…

"Do you suppose there's more in his room?"

Shiori was pulled from her thoughts by her husband's proposal. "No…but maybe…"

"We should make sure," he finished her sentence. He put the clothes in the laundry basket and picked it up to take it to his stepson's room.

The pair walked up the cream-colored carpet to the floor above. They went to Shuuichi's room and went inside without hassle. In the past, Shuuichi had kept his door locked; but running out with Yuusuke like that had lead to a hastily-left room.

Once inside, Shiori began to pick through his dresser, feeling a little guilty about going through her son's things. However, she needed proof that her son was a pervert and not something else. Some porn, maybe.

Her husband had the same thought and looked under Shuuichi's mattress for some proof that the other wasn't gay. His mattress had been where he had kept his porn, after all.

And boy did he find porn.

"Shiori," his voice held anger and confusion. Deep down he felt he had known this about his stepson for years, but had denied it. How could he not know? The evidence was everywhere: the hair, the voice, the walk, and the mysterious disappearances.

Shiori turned to look at him. He threw the man-porn on the floor in anger and she felt her eyes tear up. Her son was gay! Shiori shook her head, "It's a mistake…"

"He's a fag."

"It's a mistake!" She felt her heart break. Her son was gay. The only blood relative of the man she had loved and devoted her life to was gay. He was tainted blood. She shook her head some more, covering her eyes as tears started to flow.

Her husband stalked to the dresser and began ripping out the contents until he found the hidden drawer. He took out and threw Shuuichi's skirts, blouses, high-heels, and hair trinkets on top of the magazine. "Your son is gay. _Your _son is gay!"

Shiori slumped against a wall in tears. Her son was gay! No…he wasn't her son. "My son isn't gay." Her voice was shaky, like she was fending off an attack of some sort. "I have no son, other then the one you brought into this marriage."

Her husband looked at her before pulling her to her feet and into a hug. "I'll take care of this," he promised, "You'll never see him again."

A few hours later he tossed Minamino Shuuichi out of the house and onto the freshly laden, out-of-season snow with the threat that if he came back for his things before they were ready, he would be arrested for trespassing.

**Moon: **Short filler chapter. This chapter is meant for you to see how shiori can go from thinking highly of Shuu to abandoning him. But yes, anyway...we're still a way off from the end.


	9. Black and White

**Moon: **Do NOT give me crap about how late this is. I had it done a LONG time ago. Why is it so late? That doesn't matter. The point is it's here now. My goal for the climax of our little story is twenty pages, double my longest chapter so far. And damn it, I will get there!

Thanks to Ryuuie for proofing this.

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho for which this based.

The sky was thick with white flakes of cold blades that floated down to the ground in a whimsical state. They stuck to the ground and erased all signs of spring from the earth. The small flowers popping up through the melting snow were being suffocated by the out-of-season blizzard that was sucking all life from the delicate earth.

The snow covered Shuuichi from head to toe as he climbed the stairs to Genkai's temple. This was the last place he could go, and if Genkai didn't take him in, he would be back on the streets until he could get Yuukou to come pick him up from Tokyo. The redhead really wasn't one to sleep in snow.

Hours earlier, he had been thrown out of his house, literally. He had pulled himself to his feet and walked out of the yard, dejected. The only thought that had been running through the teenager's head was the laundry and how stupid he had been to do it. Shuuichi could only think about how if he hadn't gone to Tokyo, his clothes wouldn't have smelled like booze and he wouldn't have had to wash them.

Not knowing where else to go, he had walked across town to Yuusuke's apartment. The snow had picked up and the metal stairs leading up to the raven-haired boy's floor were slick with ice. Shuuichi, too distracted by the day's events, had fallen going up them and had busted his chin open, leaving a gash under his jaw bleeding heavily. He'd held onto the rail tightly and pushed all thoughts from his head as he climbed back up. Finally, he had reached apartment twenty-four B. He knocked on the door and Yuusuke answered, only to slam the door in his face.

Shuuichi had felt his eyes tear up and wiped the water away. The cold air seemed to freeze his tears. He had stayed dry-eyed throughout the rest of the night. He had stayed dry-eyed when he went to Kuwabara's and the same thing happened. Yuusuke had called ahead.

He had stayed dry-eyed all the way to the other side of the city, stopping only once to sit down on a frozen bench. Shuuichi's feet hurt and his chin was staining the snow crimson. He didn't even wipe the blood away as it trickled down his neck. The city lights buzzed around him, not noticing how upset he was. No one stopped to see if he was okay, and no one slowed down to even look at him. It seemed the city could go on fine without him. Life could go on fine without him.

Several minutes later, he resumed his walk to Genkai's. Now, he was on the stairs of Genkai's temple, the forest around him black in the winter night's sky. The trees seemed to hum with Shuuichi's uncertainty. Had Yuusuke called ahead here, too? Would Genkai and Yukina turn him away? What about Hiei? Was he here waiting to chase him off too? The trees echoed his questions back at him, but Shuuichi turned a deaf ear.

Wind blew, chilling Shuuichi further; but, he didn't notice. He slipped up the stairs but this time caught himself, digging his fingernails into the snow. He pushed himself up and continued his trek up the steep slope. The moon was hidden behind a cloud of snow. Pieces of ice began to fall from the trees. Shuuichi's long, red hair began to freeze and stick together. He wished he was wearing more then just his pajamas and a jacket.

Yuusuke's jacket.

Shuuichi didn't notice as he got to the top of the stairs and entered under the temple arch. His feet seemed to take him by remote to the front entrance of the temple where he had spent a lazy, rainy day with everyone not a week ago. A week ago, the weather had started to turn warm, but it was only teasing the people of Japan, turning back into the harsh winter cold.

He stumbled into the temple, opening the paper screen door without announcement. As soon as he was in the room, the heat from the temple hit him in the face, providing a strong antithesis to his frozen face and hair. His cream-colored face turned red and his nose started to run a little. His tears thawed and began to pour from his eyes. His busted chin began to bleed again. Shuuichi covered his face with his hands.

Within seconds, Shuuichi felt a weight at his side, tugging at his arm. He removed his hands to find himself slumped on the ground, leaning against the wall. His wet pajamas were dripping on the floor. A teal-haired girl was at his side in a light blue kimono. A soft light emitted from her hands and to his bloodied chin. Her blood-red eyes looked to Shuuichi in a worried manner before she called for Genkai.

Shuuichi caught her hand. "Yukina," he spoke. Yukina was Hiei's younger sister, an ice maiden from the demon world. Her main purpose at the temple was to heal. "Let it bleed." He could barely believe the words coming from his own mouth. He wanted to disappear, and if his chin bled, maybe he would be washed away in a sea of crimson.

Shuuichi's words just made Yukina call for the older woman louder as she forced her healing powers on her red-headed friend. She had his wound closed in a matter of moments. Genkai stood in the door, watching the scene.

Genkai was an old, old woman, and her exact age was a mystery to the redhead. She was wrinkled, and her once-vibrant pink hair was a dull grey. Her skin had a yellow tint to it, and she was very short, only about four and a half feet tall. She wore a red robe with a purple sash. Genkai looked on wordlessly until Yukina was done; then, she stepped closer, eyeing the familiar boy. "What happened?" Her voice was gruff.

Shuuichi looked up to Genkai for a moment before wiping his face clean of snow, tears, and snot. He rubbed his eyes; his hair was sticking to his face. "Everyone found out that I prefer men. They all hate me now. I have nowhere else to go."

Yukina gasped a little and looked to Shuuichi. He did not meet her gaze. She began to spit out questions like "Are you alright?" and "Do you need something else healed?" As her questions were left unanswered, she began to take a different course of action. The ice maiden said things such as "Some tea will make you feel better" and "I'm sure everything will be corrected."

Shuuichi just continued to look at Genkai, determined to not get kicked out. Genkai said, "I am embarrassed by how easily you let them hate you." She turned around, not finding the situation worth her time. "You have a room here, don't you? Put on some dry clothes. Dinner is in a half hour."

Shuuichi was confused, not sure if Genkai was being accepting or not. She had scolded him and welcomed him in once breath. He decided that she didn't give a rat's ass; after all, that was the most Genaki-like thing to do.

He watched her leave and sighed in relief, glad that he would be in a warm bed tonight, even if it was not his own. Shuuichi stood before realizing Yukina was still gabbing on. He looked to her. "Yukina," his tone was harsh. Yukina looked at him in shock. "I am not sick. Stop acting like I have some disease that can be cured with your herbs." He went to his room, leaving Yukina a little shocked at his actions.

"But homosexuality is wrong... right?" She asked nobody in particular in the empty room.

**Moon: **Did you enjoy? Hang on kiddies, a climax and a conclusion. Two more chapters. Hard to believe I started writing this last Feb. Or was it sooner? I think I may have started this in September of 2005...I don't know, I just know that I didn't post it for a long time after I wrote the first chapter.


	10. No Regrets

**Moon: **I hope the wait was worth it. I've been working on this chapter since before I started the last chapter. I reached my goal of twenty pages, not including the before and after notes and disclaimer. Take that, all of those readers that stopped reading my earlier works because they just weren't long enough.

A special thanks and happy birthday to my beta reader Ryuuie Mizishi.

I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho, but this is my original plot idea.

Enjoy.

The message was short. It said that they were going to Disney Tokyo and that I had one week to get my stuff out of the house. They left a key for me under the doormat. Whatever I left would be thrown away when they got back.

The message was short.

When the phone rang, I didn't even pick it up. I saw who it was. All day, people had been calling me to see if I was alright, but no one meant anything by it. They all felt guilty for driving me off. They all just want to save me.

The message was short, but it was the most sincere thing I had heard all day. It wasn't the emotion I wanted, however. I wanted someone to call me being sincerely happy or sincerely concerned. The most sincere emotion depicted through that little piece of metal was hatred.

_We're going to Disney Tokyo. Whatever isn't gone when we get back is being thrown out. You have one week. After that, we never want to see you again._

Sincerity is crap.

Out of everything in that message, the thing that bothered me the most was that they were going to Disney Tokyo. Out of everything, that trivial little piece of information hurt the most. A fire burned in my belly. I was so angry.

Mom had always promised we'd go there. I thought it was silly. Human entertainment, mice, greasy food. Pheh. It was sickening to even think about, and I always dreaded the day she would keep that promise. Well, look at me now. I was jealous. I was jealous that she was going with that man and that boy. Like a happy little perfect model family. Without me.

The world will turn without me there. The city lights will burn. The birds will migrate. Seasons will change, children will be born, children will grow, the cycle of life will continue. I'm just a small little speck on this earth. I'm not even worth enough to my friends for them to sincerely care. The only emotion I'm worthy of is hate.

That's why I ran off. Everyone was trying to save me. That's why everyone had been calling all day. They wanted me to go back to the temple and be saved.

Yuusuke showed up at Genkai's last night while I was sleeping off the cold. He came in and started talking slander against me. In his defense, he didn't know that I was in the next room. I woke up and listened to him. He was so angry with me. And then he began to cry. He broke down right there in Yukina's presence.

He wasn't mad that I was gay. He didn't like that, but he was pissed off that I had lied to him. Of course, that was the last straw for me. That night had been too stressful, so I started crying again. I cried myself back to sleep. I woke up once in the night and found Yuusuke on the futon next to me. I couldn't help myself and curled up next to him.

I won't lie. I'd had a crush on Yuusuke since I had realized that I was gay a few years ago. I would occasionally catch myself looking at Yuusuke's shirtless chest during the tournaments and whenever he sparred. He just had this muscular chest. He glistened under the noon sun, his sweat making him look rugged and handsome.

And he was always so kind and whole-heartened. Everything he did, he did with a passion. I longed to be the root of that passion. I longed for him to have that passion towards me. I used to pretend that I was Keiko, and that it was me he was kissing. I was the one he loved. Not her. He couldn't love her, because in my world, he loved men. And I was the only man he would look at.

Yuusuke had woken up at my movement and wrapped an arm around me. "I don't blame you for Keiko…"

"I love you."

Yuusuke went stiff, and I knew that I had screwed up again, but I had to tell him. I had to tell him how much he meant to me. Somehow, I knew what would happen the next day. I had to do this now before I left for good and could never say that to anyone else ever again.

"Just go to sleep," he said to me, relaxing a little. I knew he was giving me one last moment of peaceful bliss when he started to pet my hair. I knew that he didn't like me like that, and I knew that he would reprimand me again for being gay in the morning. And I think he knew what I subconsciously knew, what I had subconsciously planned out moments before. He was giving me one last moment of love before I left.

I faked sleep for a while to see if he would leave me, but he didn't. He stayed right there next to me with one arm holding me and one arm playing with my hair. Soon his motions put me to sleep, and when I woke up, he was still next to me; only, his hand was still because he was still asleep.

I didn't move. I stayed right there in his arms. I remember thinking that it wasn't real, that I was already dead. I remember feeling scared. I'm not sure if I was scared that the moment wouldn't end or if I was scared at the thought of what I would do that night, even though I had yet to consciously realize my choice.

Yuusuke came to and asked me why I was crying.

"I'm crying?" My voice was my shaky then, I realized.

Yuusuke nodded and sat up, pulling a pack of cigarettes from his back pocket and a lighter from his belt loop. He lit one up and took a long drag, letting the smoke escape him slowly. He stayed silent for several moments before asking once again if I was alright.

I remember sitting there next to him. That morning, the smell of recently wet clothing mingled with his scent and the smell of cigarette smoke. It was an inviting smell, one that I wouldn't mind waking up to every morning. I didn't answer him. I just laid there basking in his presence and scent.

He was petting my head, messing up my already tangled hair. I could feel him frown down at me, and I thought that this was it. He was taking away my happiness. He knew my feelings for him and would use them against me. He would reprimand me. Nothing would ever be the same between us.

"What happened to your hair? It's a muddy mess."

I swear that I sobbed harder than I had ever sobbed in my life. I was so relieved that, out of everything he could have said to me, this was the thing I wanted to hear most. I was so happy that I couldn't stop the tears.

He pulled me up into a hug, smoothing my hair down, telling me to shush. I latched onto his shirt. "I'm sorry..."

"For what?"

I didn't know why I was sorry; it just felt like something that needed to be said. I felt like, if nothing else, I should apologize for all the trouble he was going through for me, especially since, deep down, I knew that I was responsible for Keiko leaving him.

Yuusuke let go of me and messed up my hair a little. "I can't keep doing this for you, you know…"

I'd known that was coming and nodded, wiping my eyes. My voice was shaky when I responded. "I k-n-now…"

He sighed like he had just dealt me a low blow. "Don't be like that." He looked at me as if silently begging me to accept reality as it was.

I honestly wasn't trying to be like that. I wasn't trying to guilt him into anything. My normally perfectly controlled posture, voice, diction, hair, everything… I had lost control long before Yuusuke had begun to treat me kindly that night. This just made it harder to regain that control.

"I'm sorry…" At my words, Yuusuke shook his head.

"I know you are." He came over and pulled me into a strong embrace, rubbing his hands down my arm and back up, creating some friction heat in an attempt to comfort me.

The raven-haired boy that I had chased after for so long finally gave himself to me, not in the way I had imagined over the last few years, but in a much more profound one. He had acquired a deeper understanding of me over the last twenty-four hours, no, less than twenty-four hours. He had turned my life around by coming over while I washed clothes. He knew it. He didn't know the details, but he knew that if he had stayed away that night, I wouldn't be at Genkai's.

And I wouldn't have spent that night in his arms, or gotten the weight of my secret off my chest, or stopped all the hurt. It was all his doing, as much as it was mine. I had set the stage and he had lit the fuse.

Yuusuke had given me a reason to escape it all and had gained the understanding of my thought process; I had gained insight into his mind. We would be together in mind for eternity. I could look at his face and know what he was thinking of at any one time. That was an ability that no telepath could acquire with all the training in the world: to submerge themselves in the depths of the mind of Urameshi Yuusuke.

He left, and I basked on the used futon for a while, soaking in the heat that it held in the indent made by Yuusuke's body. I almost fell back asleep until my hair made me feel disgusting.

Pulling myself up, I found the Swiss army knife I kept in my coat pocket and cut the bulk of the red mass off of my head. I told myself that it was to get the dirt and rats' nests that would surely not heed to a brush and comb out. That's a lie, though. I didn't know it at the time, but I was just testing the blade. I had to make sure it was dull enough.

Hair dulls blades, you know. During the French Revolution, they cut the hair of those to have their heads chopped off. The French didn't want to have to sharpen their blade, so they made sure that all of the hair was out of the way.

I looked down at the red tool in my hand and was glad to see some rust on it. Admittedly, I didn't know why I was glad there was rust. My plan was still subconsciously forming. Either way, I was happy that it took several cuts for the massive chunk of muddy hair to fall from my head.

I shaped up my remaining hair, getting rid of my cow-licks, looking like your average teenage boy. I felt naked without the red hair I had worked so hard to grow out, but my remorse and regret was short-lived; someone knocked on the door and snapped me to my senses. I didn't respond and finished getting washed up, changing into some of the clothes I kept at the temple.

I found one of my old pairs of worn-out jeans and a white t-shirt, one of my favorite t-shirts. I liked dressing up and all, but sometimes it was nice to be average. Who needed to be above average? And of that matter, who needed to be above average all the time? I knew mother liked me to dress up and it made me feel pretty. I would never feel pretty again with my hair short, and I wouldn't have the time to grow it out again. It was time to stop being the perfect Minamino Shuuichi or the tough Kurama. It was time to set down my past life as Youko as well. I was an average human with a broken spirit.

I emerged from my bedroom, or really the bedroom Genkai let me use whenever I stayed over, but nonetheless, it was in a numb state of mind. I came face-to-face with Kuwabara, Yukina, and Keiko. Yuusuke was in the doorway, leaning against the frame with his eyes downcast. Hiei wasn't anywhere to be seen, but that was expected. He didn't care about these petty things. There was someone else there too…

Dai was laying on the low deck-like structure surrounding the temple. I was at a complete loss as to why she would be there, automatically wondering if they wanted to persuade her to get back with me in an attempt to force me straight. It didn't even occur to me that she was a lesbian at that moment in time.

Turning my attention back to the three in front of me, I noticed Keiko, Kuwabara, and Yukina had shocked looks on their faces. I'm not sure if it was because they were realizing that I was gay, if my new hair style was inspiring awe and wonder in them, or maybe that I was trying to "better" myself and become straight, starting with my hair style. Either way, their looks were comical. My laugh snapped them out of their gazes.

"Kurama…"

"Shuuichi," I corrected them. This made Yuusuke look over confused.

"Kurama…"

"No, Shuuichi. Shuu-i-chi. Say it with me now. Shuuichi. Not Kurama. Kurama is a nickname. To use a nickname would to say you are on friendly terms with a person. You guys are holding an intervention over something I have no control over. We are not on friendly terms." I detested all three of them right now. If Keiko hadn't broken up with Yuusuke, I would have never have told him and none of this would be happening. I wouldn't be homeless. I wouldn't be friendless.

"But you DO have control over it," Kuwabara insisted.

"No I DON'T! I have NO control over the situation. I like guys. Guys are sexually appealing to me. I think men are hot. You're not," Kuwabara got an offended look in his eye, "but other guys like Yuusuke are. I have no control over who I like. I have no control over you all. I have no control over this intervention. I have no control over being homeless. I have no control over everyone I know hating me. I have NO control."

Kuwabara's offended look melted away into astonishment, and Kieko's look turned from sour to worry. Yukina's soft voice floated through the air. "You were kicked out?"

I nodded, feeling a little light-headed at missing five pounds of hair on my head. I had been kicked out by my stepdad and my mother. I could only go to Genkai's, where everyone wanted to save me. What a life.

Life. Pheh.

Keiko came forward, wanting to put a hand over me, but I pulled away and left the room. I was hungry. I had a sudden craving for apples.

I stood outside, eating my apple, trying to ignore everyone. Kuwabara and Yukina were still in the other room, talking strategy. Yuusuke was nowhere to be seen, really. Genkai, well, who knew at this point...? Though, wherever she was, Hiei was probably there as well.

Dai and Keiko, however, were right around the corner.

"What are you doing?!" Dai's voice was harsh, reminding me of a mother scolding a small child. "We used him to get what we wanted and now he's being…interrogated for it! And you're one of the prosecutors!"

Keiko's eye adopted a frightened look, afraid of Dai's harsh tone and scolding. She seemed to recoil within her chestnut hair. "Kuwabara came to me…" Her voice was small, almost like a mouse's squeak, but it was low. "If I had said no, he would have been suspicious…and then Yukina came to me. Have you seen her eyes? You can't say no to them…"

Dai shook her head. "That's no fucking excuse! He's homeless now, because we used him. Do you honestly think Yuusuke would have found out if you hadn't accused him with those panties?! You know DAMN well that Shuuichi liked him and had given him those. He said so when he was drunk and he probably doesn't even remember."

I didn't remember that. I guessed they had been at that club opening together in Tokyo when Yuukou, Mell, and I got drunk and wound up in Yuukou's bed together. Honestly, though, I cannot say it surprised me that I had said something in such a state. Nor would it be truthful to say Keiko didn't seem like a lesbian to me. She looked good there, standing next to Dai. They worked well together. I couldn't blame them for using me like they did. I would have done the same thing to either of them to be with Yuusuke.

Looking up at Kieko, I saw her eyes tear up. "I know! OKAY!? I KNOW! I know what we did was wrong, and I know what I'm doing is wrong, and I know it's our fault he was found out and and and…" Dai took Keiko into her arms. Keiko buried her face in Dai's breasts, and Dai put her chin in the crook of Keiko's neck, shushing her and smoothing her hair down while rubbing a hand along her back in a soothing manner. Keiko cried for a moment into Dai, holding onto her tightly.

Women, so emotional. Granted, I was the same way last night and early this morning, but now I was calm. I was… so calm that it was creepy. I scared myself with how calmly I looked at the scene of those two hugging and how calmly I dealt with the fact that they had catalyzed this messed-up chemical reaction called life. They had helped shape my life, no matter how misshapen it had become. They had molded me like a piece of clay, even if they hadn't meant to.

Had they meant to? They certainly couldn't have before that night in Tokyo, but they had started this before then, I guessed. Why else would Dai have gone out with me prior to that night? That one magical night...

I remember that night. It wasn't so cold. I had gone out in a skirt and hadn't needed a jacket. The seasons had begun to change. The snow had almost completely melted. It was warm out. I was happy.

The snow started up again a few weeks later, when Keiko broke up with Yuusuke. When Yuusuke came to me in rage. When I had been found out.

Dai kissed Keiko's cheek and pulled away, wiping a tear or two away. "Calm down. Regardless of our wrongs, we don't need to be caught as well in penance. Pull yourself together and we'll leave soon. We'll travel to Tokyo again and go dancing."

I figured that would be the solution. They would run away from their problems, like I wanted to. I did agree with one thing though. They really didn't deserve to be caught because of their guilt. No matter how much they deserved to be ousted, I wouldn't do it. I'd let them keep their dirty little secret, and hopefully they would guard it more carefully than I had. After all, in the end, wasn't I the one who chose to confide in Yuusuke that I liked men? That I liked him?

That I love him?

I turned away from the scene and went to tuck some hair behind my ear, only to realize the red mass was gone. Only now did I realize how warm my hair kept me as the snow picked up. What little green was on the vast expanse of land around me was completely covered in a foot of snow.

I turned and went to walk back inside, wanting cocoa. The girls were gone, Keiko back inside with Kuwabara and Yukina, keeping her cover until they could make an excuse to leave.

I poured some milk into a kettle and put it on a high heat, hoping it would boil sooner rather than later. As it did, I turned a blind eye to the pot to look for the chocolate.

The aroma of melting chocolate and warm milk drifted through the air, attracting more company. My raven-haired Adonis entered the room, looking around. His eyes landed on me and the fresh snow in my short choppy hair and then to the pot. "I want some."

Wordlessly, I pulled out a cup and tipped the pot just enough to pour the perfect cup of cocoa. The hot porcelain warmed my hands, and I almost drank the chocolate liquid myself before forfeiting the cup.

Yuusuke looked down at the cup for a moment before taking a sip, burning his tongue. "Mother—" He sighed and set the cup down, looking for water. I giggled a little and he looked up at me smiling. "What? Is my pain that funny?"

I nodded and looked away, pouring my own cup of hot chocolate. "Why do you smile?" Asking that felt like a dream. I couldn't remember moving my lips and forming those words, or flexing the tone of my voice to form a question. I knew I had asked it though. I had been wanting to since the night before.

The other looked me over for a moment. "Why do I what? Why don't you tell me why you cut your hair?"

A picture of a Marie Antoinette's rolling head entered my mind and I smiled a little. "No reason." I sipped my cup without pain. "What changed your mind?"

"About what?" The water hadn't helped, it was clear, as Yuusuke was halfway outside to get some snow for his tongue.

"About how you felt towards me? I mean, I told you and you stomped off in anger, then last night…" I trailed off. Nothing had happened in that short night, but a wonderful sleep in the arms of the man I loved. We didn't make love. We didn't kiss. We just laid there all night…

"Well…" he looked at my arm. "You haven't taken the bandage from your tattoo off yet." So that was it. He had revealed his tattoo. He had remembered more good times than bad. We had gotten it only last night, the same night he had found out and thrown a fit. Hell, we weren't even supposed to take those bandages off yet, but he had and it had meant something to him.

I think, just as I subconsciously knew what was coming, he did too. He knew what I was planning and was giving me that one last peaceful moment of bliss to bask in. My blaze of glory. My best-seller.

He was just making me comfortable. Maybe it was a futile attempt to stop me, or maybe it was his genuine feelings toward me.

It wasn't genuine though. I was fooling myself into thinking that, but I knew it wasn't. He didn't love me as I loved him. Yuusuke still loved Keiko, who loved Dai, but Yuusuke didn't know that. Yuusuke didn't know Dai's roll in the grand scheme of things. She was the cause and I was the effect and Yuusuke was just a stop along the way to the climax. And Keiko was just an accessory.

I shook my head no, the lightheaded feeling returning and making me feel a little ill. "No, I'm not supposed to take the bandage off for another day or two. You should know that, you little cheater."

Shrugging, Yuusuke put some snow into his cocoa to cool it, as to not abuse his tongue further. He drank the cup in one big gulp and set it down on the counter. "That was good cocoa." I thanked him, and he left the room, going out through Kuwabara's lair and back out front to lean on the railing around the deck.

I was slow to finish my cocoa, prolonging my return to the other room where more shouts awaited me. What would they pull on me next? That it wasn't ethical?

Well, here is the question I pose. Is anything truly ethical, or do we make it so? Are things right because society tells us they are right? Are things bad because they are not accepted among the masses? Does it depend on your culture, your surroundings, or the stage on which the act is preformed? What makes one thing right and another wrong?

A man could be rich, but, depending on society, he could be a thief or merely lucky. Or, if he gives back to the community, he could be considered a philanthropist. However, doesn't that mean that society decides what it right and wrong based solely on their gain or lack there of from the situation?

Who are we to decide what is moral and what is amoral? Maybe I like other men because I chose to, or maybe I like them for reasons beyond my control. However, does that make me broken? And if I'm not broken, why fix me? To improve me? What if I don't want to be improved?

And why does it matter if it doesn't affect society as a whole? If I were to marry another man, would that cause the apocalypse? Would anyone other than my life and the life of my partner be affected? Maybe it would change the lives of my close family, but doesn't the same thing happen when a man marries a woman?

With these thoughts running through my head, I walked back out into the main room. Kuwabara decided I needed to be saved. When that didn't work, the orange-haired lug decided I was just pulling an elaborate prank of some sort. I had to hand it to him, though. He tried. He was trying his best to do for me what he thought was best, but what was best for him was bad for me.

Yukina joined in again. She decided that I was sick and needed to be cured. Being as fast working and efficient as she was, Yukina was already half done with what she called a miracle cure. The smell made me sick to my stomach. She too, however, was just trying to help. They were both trying to be friends to me. They were both trying to do what they thought was best for me, only what they thought was best wasn't best. It was worst.

Keiko ended up excusing herself for a need to help in her family's ramen shop, and Dai went with her, saying that she had been hired as a part-time employee. Nobody paid much attention as they left. They were all too focused on me.

This was the first time in my life that I wasn't enjoying attention. Kuwabara's scratchy voice and Yukina's potion's weird smell made me sick, so I turned and ran. I just couldn't take it anymore! It was just too much to handle for the moment.

The emotion began to come back to me as the phone rang. Genkai's temple number flashed on my phone several times before Kuwabara's cell phone number began to appear, and then Yuusuke's. I doubted Yuusuke was actually calling me, though.

As the annoying ring tone rang through the air, my emotion grew to hatred. Why wouldn't they just leave me alone!? It wasn't like I could turn my phone off. I needed to go get my stuff from home.

I sat in the park, in the snow, and looked over the frozen lake. It was a beautiful sight, the city skyline in the distance and a few ice skaters doing tricks on the frozen water. The sky was cloudy and gloom, however. The sun refused to shine.

That's when my mom's number flashed on the annoying phone in my hand. I stared at it, dreading answering it. I wanted so much to go home to my mother's loving arms and warm embrace. I wanted her words to comfort me and for her to hold me in her lap like when I was a boy. But most of all I wanted her to tell me to come home. I wanted for her to ask me to come home to her safely and live there and stay there.

I didn't feel like being let down and losing it, however. I knew if I had picked up the phone I would have sobbed. Maybe sobbing would have provoked feelings of pity in my mother, but instead I let it ring and I let my voicemail pick it up.

The message was short. I was to go in and out, getting my stuff within the week. The key would be hidden under the mat for me. Whatever I didn't take would be thrown out, and if I came back, the police would be called for my trespassing.

They were going to Disney Tokyo.

I was supposed to go to Disney Tokyo. I was supposed to be the object of my mother's affection. I was supposed to be the perfect human child.

I was supposed to be a ruthless demon thief. I had the reputation of a killer. I was a thief that could pick any lock and conquer any spell to get the treasure inside. I had been _the _Youko Kurama. I could solve any puzzle and work my way out of any trap.

So why couldn't I pick my way out of this lock, why couldn't I solve this puzzle, why couldn't I work my way out of this trap? I was caged. My family was succeeding where that hunter had failed. My mother's words killed me. They killed me. I was human. I was supposed to be a demon. I wasn't even worth my mother's affection.

The message was short.

I wasn't even worth the time to be properly disposed of!

My anger was short-lived, as was my rest in the park. I heard a familiar scratchy voice calling my name. Kuwabara was searching. My spiteful attitude returned and all I could think of was that he was actively trying to save me now.

Before Kuwabara could get near me, I ran out of site, instinctively running towards home. As I ran, a classmate stopped me. It was a brunette in the year under me.

"Shuuichi, do you want to go to the movies with me?" Her voice was soft and sincere. I stared at her in awe for a moment, unsure of how to react to someone actually giving me the time of day. It wasn't normal, or at least it wasn't normal anymore.

I heard Kuwabara call my name again, and I ran.

As I said before, sincerity was, is, and ever shall be crap. No one will ever be sincere about anything. That girl, for instance, just wants a boyfriend. Every girl in that school wanted a boyfriend and my long hair was their envy, as Yuusuke was my envy.

I look back on that scene with the classmate now and I realize something. She asked me to go with her after I had disposed of my massive red mane. I wish I had realized that before, but I didn't. Maybe things would have turned out different if I had.

But still, all she really wanted was a nice piece of ass.

I ran and could feel Kuwabara closing the gap between us. I picked up my cell and dialed Yuukou's number, but there was no answer. I took a shortcut around a building and Kuwabara followed me, but he slipped on a large sheet of ice that I merely glided across.

I tried Yuukou's number on the phone again, but there was no answer.

Things seemed to blur around me as I leapt over a bush, through the snow-covered yard of my former home, and to the back door. I found the key and went in.

The house was eerie-sounding. No one was home. Everything was clean. Nothing was out of place. It almost seemed like a ghost world, like it hadn't been lived in.

I took a moment to catch my breath, and I closed the back door. I put on my house slippers, only to take them off again. They smelled of garbage. They had probably thrown them away only to realize I needed my stuff.

Man, that was considerate of them.

I heard an ambulance go past and the lights lit up my face in the window for a second. I was hideous without my hair. It was short and choppy now, a straight line across the bottom from where the knife had slid across with ease.

When the ambulance passed and I could no longer look at my reflection, I started a pot of tea, as I had done everyday upon arriving home from school for the past several years. The smell of the fresh green tea leaves seemed to bring the house to life, creating the atmosphere I had come to know and love as a child. The only things that were missing were the smells and sounds that resulted as the product of Mother starting dinner.

One of my first memories in this human body, after dying as the Youko, was cooking with Mother. It was the sort of activity that had a calming effect on me after sitting still in school all day.

I kneeled at the table and turned the heater on under the blanket, sipping the tea and letting it warm me. I wiped my runny nose and I could feel my cheeks turning red as the heat from the room contrasted with the cold snow and ice on my clothing and skin. Absentmindedly, I called Yuukou again, but once again there was no answer.

After finishing my tea, I washed the pot and cup before putting it away and going upstairs to my room. I noticed that pictures had been taken down and replaced. They really wasted no time, erasing me from existence in their home. The only thing left with any evidence that I had ever been a part of the family was my room.

I opened the door and demolition met my eyes. They had overturned everything, probably looking to see what else I had been hiding. I noticed my dairy laying face down on the floor. They had read it.

I picked it up, and started:

_Journal,_

_Everything went wrong. Everything went wrong and there is nothing I can do to take control of my life. I can't get a hold of Yuukou. I have no money to go to Tokyo. All of my friends are trying to save me._

_This is what lying gets me, I suppose. I have no regrets._

_Shuuichi_

I closed it and made my bed, before placing the dairy under the pillow just as I had always done.

I'm not sure why, maybe it was out of habit, but I cleaned my room, putting everything in its place. I put all of my cloths away, folding them and placing them into the dresser neatly. I found my girl cloths, folded them all neatly, and put them into the hidden drawer with my curling iron, my straightening iron, and my other toys. I put my shoes in the closet and I folded a stack of towels, putting them on a shelf in my dresser. I even alphabetized my book collection.

When everything was nice and neat and clean, I lounged on my bed and pulled out my knife, pushing the blade in and out, in and out, in and out.

It was hypnotic.

A cut across my finger drew the smallest amount of blood possible. It barely beaded before dripping into the groove next to my fingernail, trapping itself between the nail and skin on my left index finger. My acute sense of smell picked up the metallic scent

I squeezed my finger a bit to get the bead of blood out of the groove so that it would run down the side of my finger. It did, and I watched it go down my arm and stain my shirt.

I looked at my knife, flipping it in and out and in and out, watching the little bit of blood on the blade smear.

I cut down my palm, tracing the lines on my left hand. They were shallow cuts, and the blood flowed at a controlled, resisting pace. It was almost like the blood was afraid to come out of its refuge. Its home was my body and I was forcing it out, forcing it to find a new place of residence.

I looked up at myself in the mirror hanging on the back of my door. I was a mess. My clothes were wet and stained, and my face was dirty. I got up, ignoring the dripping blood coming from my left palm. I got up and went to wash my face in the bathroom before going back into my room and changing clothes. I put on my favorite green button-up shirt and a pair of brown slacks. I put on some warm, woolen socks because it was so cold outside. I've always hated the cold.

I sat back down. My hand had stopped bleeding by this point, and my new clothes were clean of any crimson stains.

Picking my knife back up, I looked at my pillow where my journal had been hidden. No regrets. Did I have any regrets? If I could have told Yuusuke earlier, would I have? I don't think I would have. I glanced at my shoulder, where right under the green fabric laid my tattoo.

If, in fact, I really did have no regrets, did I have a reason to stay? I had no family. I loved my mother still, as I always would, but I no longer had the luxury to call her mom. Besides, it wasn't like I had to worry about her anymore. She had a husband and another son to take care of her and make sure she was happy and healthy, not that I hadn't already ensured that with the Mirror of Forlorn Hope years before.

And my friends…my friends. Yuusuke seemed to have had made his peace with my last night, but what about the others?

Kuwabara was blindly trying to save me from my own sexuality. He was trying so hard to save me that he was pushing me away. A little space and maybe someone to understand and things would have been okay, but that's not what he gave me.

Keiko was in the closet and directly contradicting her beliefs while helping Kuwabara save me. What peeved me most about her was that she was trying to save face for Yuusuke and Kuwabara about her relationship with Dai. She wasn't strong enough to say to Yuusuke, "Hey look we can't date anymore. I'm a lesbian." But then again, I had never been man enough to come out of the closet either. I was forced out.

Yukina had been trying to heal me. She was so unlike her brother in every way, and this was the biggest. She tried to help everyone, even people who didn't want or need to be helped. Like me. It was an insult, more than anything. Homosexuality is not an ailment. I could not be healed.

Dai wasn't really my friend, just my fake ex-girlfriend and Kieko's lover. I still don't understand why she was never straightforward with me. She never told me she was chasing a girl. She had just said that if she ever decided to date someone, we'd end the ruse.

Genkai didn't give a fuck. That was probably the biggest comfort to me throughout this whole ordeal. Even more so than Yuusuke's acceptance, to Genkai I didn't change at all. She never got angry with me about anything; I was just there, same as I always was.

Hiei was nowhere to be seen. This puzzled me the most. Did he even know what was going on? Or did he abandon me?

And Yuukou, my best friend, the one who had helped me out when I was in turmoil about my sexual identity, I couldn't get a hold of him. He was nowhere to be found.

So no, I had no reason to stay, and I had no regrets.

There was one thing that bothered me, that I would have liked to stick around and find out, but it wasn't a big enough reason to stop the proceedings.

I was curious about whether or not Yuukou was ignoring me. This was my last resort, the knife. I would have gone to him, but I had no money and I couldn't just stick around here and wait for the others to save me. So where was Yuukou? I had never had a hard time getting a hold of him before. Wherever he was, I was sure he was safe. And I was sure he wouldn't miss me too much. We hadn't gotten the chance to spend a lot of time together, after all.

I leaned against the wall opposite the door, staring at myself in the mirror. My eyes had lost color, as had my skin. The once emerald-green had dulled into a hazy, dark, limp pine tree green. My skin had acquired a gray hue to it over a reddening tint, displaying the start of a cold brought about by my prolonged time in the snow.

I hate the snow.

I reached up and scratched my head with both hands rapidly, aiming to mess up my hair and let it go a little wild. Once I was satisfied, I smoothed it out and took my knife, deciding to shape it up.

After several minutes my hair had smoothed. It was short and I had added layers, taking away wisps of my reaming red locks with the edge of the blade. I left it longer in the front with one piece the curled around my chin. I flattened out my bangs and wisped them. Finally, when I was satisfied, I picked up the hair and threw it away. I was satisfied with how smooth the choppy mass had become. It looked almost good. Short, but good.

I sat back down and looked at my face. It seemed I had acquired some new lines around my face, aging me several years. I no longer looked like the schoolboy I was, but rather a salary man, about to go to work in his good cloths.

I stared down at my half-healed hand. When I stretched it out, it began to bleed a little bit again.

I grasped the knife with my left hand, smearing blood over the handle.

It didn't hurt.

It didn't hurt but the smell that reached my nostrils brought tears to my eyes, how overwhelmingly strong that metallic scent was. I looked back across the room into the mirror. I leaned my head back against the wall lazily. I had no energy.

My legs straightened out and spread, allowing the small of my back to sag down onto the floor a little. I starred at my reflection hard, as if I was trying to see something that would only appear in a split second of time, never to be seen again.

I concentrated hard, blankly.

My chest rose and fell steadily. My intake of breath was shaky coming in, but smooth and willing to escape. It was ready to escape. I was ready to escape.

My toes curled under my feet in the wool socks and cracked. I relaxed them back, glad to release the carbon from my joints.

I was warm. The house was warming. There was a trail of warm liquid from my chest to my hips, like I was bathing in a hot spring. I was warm.

I closed my eyes lightly, not wanting this feeling of warmth to end. I didn't want to be cold anymore. I wanted the snow to melt and create spring. I wanted the suffocating plants to have their air, letting their snow captors melt and provide water for their thirsty roots. I wanted the warmth. The warmth of a fire, or a blanket, of a family, of Yuusuke; I wanted it all. I wanted every night to be as warm as it had been last night. Warmth made me feel good and happy. It brought about new life and new chances.

I wanted the snow to melt.

I opened my eyes again; tears were washing down the sides of my face as I realized something. Warmth was just too much to ask for. Warmth was something that only deserving people got and I certainly wasn't one of them.

What made a person deserving? Society? The nation? The government?

Whatever it was, I didn't deserve it. The heat was disappearing. The heat from my face, from my feet, from my chest, from my belly, from my hips, it was all gone.

The soothing feeling of that cascading liquid was fading. The warmth of my blood was leaving. Inside it brought lasting relief from the cold, a constant warm temperature. Outside, it brought temporary relief from the bitter snow.

I looked down at it; I could feel my lip fall open dumbly. "Why…is the blood gone?"

Staring at it, for the life of me, I couldn't realize that I was running out of blood to flow out and warm me.

After a moment or two, I laid my head back against the wall and sobbed silently. I was so cold. I just wanted some warmth.

The door opened and I could barely hear it. My hearing was going. It was hard to focus or concentrate on anything, really. Discerning the door from a creak in the old floors of this old house was hard.

"KURAMA!" Yuusuke's voice yelled. "You home!? Kuwabara called me from the hospital. He was chasing you and slipped on some ice. The buffoon broke his ankle. I wanted to make sure you were okay."

As Yuusuke spoke, his voice got closer and closer, but it was harder and harder to hear. When he was finally at the door, I wanted to say something, but when I opened my mouth, my voice failed me.

I resolved to just wait for him to enter so that I could see that he had come for me and that he cared for me. Maybe it wasn't his voice and I was being misled. Maybe it was Kuwabara, trying to coax me out of hiding.

I stared at the door as the brass handle turned, my eyes shifting in and out of focus. It took all I had just to not up and close them completely. It was like keeping them open drained my energy too much to do anything else.

Yuusuke came in and was speechless at the sight of me. I'm not sure why though. Was he speechless because of my hair, possibly? I mean, I had styled it pretty nicely and maybe it was more his thing than my long locks.

He ran to my side and grasped the knife, but did not pull at the last second. "I'm afraid I'll do more damage…"

I stared at him, not sure what he was talking about. "More…damage?" I managed to say. I could barely hear my own voice. Apparently, he didn't either, because he looked at me with a 'what did you say' look.

Yuusuke stared at me for a moment. "You have a knife in your chest!"

"I do?" I didn't know that. I let my head lull down and looked at the red handle of my army knife. "Oh, I do have a knife in my chest…" How had that gotten there? I don't remember taking it out of my pocket. Had someone stabbed me? That wasn't good. I probably had blood on my favorite shirt by now. Pooh.

When I looked back up, Yuusuke was on his cell phone, calling an ambulance. When he hung up, he leaned back down and I reached up, wrapping my arms around his neck. My eyes were blurred with tears. "I want to be warm…"

Yuusuke knelt down and hugged me close. "Okay, okay you will be. I promise. I won't let you get cold again. Just hold on for a little while, okay?"

He rocked me gently, and I closed my eyes, tired. I wanted to fall asleep. I was numb; the feeling of Yuusuke holding me barely registered.

I felt his gaze on me. He shook me gently. "Don't close your eyes," he pleaded. There was fear in his voice. I didn't want him to be scared. There was no reason to be scared. People closed their eyes all the time and he knew that perfectly well, but I didn't want to let him down.

I looked at him, trying to do as he said, wanting to please Yuusuke. Maybe if I did what he said, he'd love me. I opened my eyes as wide as I could, but Yuusuke just kept telling me to open them more. I starred at him, wanting to do what he said, trying to, but they were slipping slowly.

I closed them and leaned on Yuusuke, blanketed by his arms. I loved the feeling of him holding me, and I would do anything to have him do that for me every night from now as long as I lived. He would hold me in our home while I fell asleep. We'd be happy together, always. From now until the day I die.

When I opened my eyes again there were men in my room, lifting me onto a stretcher. I couldn't hear what they were saying, but Yuusuke didn't go with them when they carried me down the stairs and to the ambulance. I was scarred, shouting for the man I longed for, screaming for him. Apparently my voice had returned because the men were trying to silence me as they walked me out to the big white ambulance.

I had stopped calling. Yuusuke was at the door of my house, saying something. I strained to hear what he said. I thought I heard him say that he loved me, but the words didn't match his lips. His lips mouthed that he'd follow the ambulance. I closed my eyes again, feeling them strap a mask across my face.

I opened them. Someone was yelling for the traffic to move. He was out of sight, probably the driver. It wasn't a voice I recognized. We weren't moving and I didn't understand why. I tried to look at one of the men but they were two busy hooking giving me an IV.

I closed my eyes again, the sirens blaring in my ears.

I opened them. Two men were arguing about whether it would help or hurt me to take the knife out. One was saying that if they took it out, I'd loose more blood, but the other said that if we did take it out, they could bandage me, however the first man said that pulling it out could cause internal damage and start internal bleeding.

We still weren't moving.

I closed my eyes again; no one was touching me or my knife.

I opened them. A wave of panic swept through me. Where was Yuusuke!? He had been holding me not minutes before, and now he was gone. Where was I!? What was I doing here? Why did it hurt so much!?

Unable to take the pain, I closed my eyes again.

I opened them. Someone was shouting on a phone that the traffic wouldn't move. Someone said my blood type, demanding that some be waiting for an infusion upon my arrival.

I closed my eyes again; we began to move. Slowly, the traffic horns honking obnoxiously around the ambulance were barely audible above the blaring siren, but they were letting up nonetheless.

I opened my eyes again; someone had shouted that I'd stopped breathing and someone else was performing CPR, and there was a tube down my throat with someone pumping a plastic cylinder, forcing my chest up and down.

I stared up at the ceiling; there was a break in the pure white tile as we moved, going through two big white double doors. I recognized that we were in the local hospital. I was being pushed on a bed. Someone was desperately trying to hook up a bag of blood to my IV. There was a heart monitor.

Beep...beep…beep…beep...

The smell of blood made me sick. I felt like gagging, but the tube was down my throat. Someone told me to calm down and relax, to breath through my nose.

I had a cold and my nose was stuffed. I stared blankly at the ceiling, wanting to breath, wanting to let the oxygen to fill my lungs and bring relief.

Beep…beep…beep…beep...

My vision was going. My eyes felt dry, like there was no fluid in my body to moisten them. I closed my eyes, wondering why they were dry. I couldn't have cried, even if I had wanted to. There was nothing left to cry out.

Beep…beep…beep…beep...

What the hell was that beeping!? It was noisy, deafening, and so loud. I felt like a bomb was going off every time I heard a beep. I wanted the beeping to stop. It killed me to hear it.

"His pulse is going! We're losing him!"

Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

It was getting faster, louder, more sickening to listen to. I couldn't stand it. I just wanted it to stop. I prayed for it to stop. Stop it, Yuusuke. Come to my rescue. Make it stop. I'll do anything for it to stop.

Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.

AH, THAT WAS THE WORST OF ALL! Just make it stop. Please…just make it stop! I'll stop being gay. I'll try my hardest to be who you want me to be! Just please, make it stop. Make it stop make it stop make it stop.

"The cuts are too deep! The knife is in too deep!" The doctor was trying, sincerely trying to help me.

Where's my knife? I want my knife. That knife is the only thing I have to remember my father by! He wouldn't have kicked me out for being who I am. He would have embraced it. He would have accepted me. He would have made Mother hundreds of times happier than what that new guy could ever do.

I hadn't known him for very long, my father, and I barely had any memory of him, but somehow I just knew he'd have been better. This would have never happened if my mother's eyes hadn't been blinded by her new husband's beliefs. He tainted her mind.

Beeeeeeeeeeeeep.

FUCKING BEEPS! I just want them to stop! MAKE THEM STOP! Every single one of them is like a miniature Nagasaki or Hiroshima. Every single one of them killed me. It was just painful. It made my eardrums burst. It was like nails on a chalkboard. Like hands on cellophane.

"Clear."

What?

"Clear."

What?

"Clear."

What?

"Stop."

Stop? Stop what? Stop that man with the bag of blood? Stop him from trying to open it? If he gets any on my favorite shirt, I'll kill him. I love this shirt and I'd die if anything happened to it, especially a blood stain. Those were hardest to get out.

What happened to 'clear' anyway? Why 'clear' in the first place? Clear what? Clear water? Clear soda? All clear ahead?

"We've lost him."

My eyes went out of focus. I couldn't feel anything. I was numb. The beeping stopped, thankfully. I couldn't hear anything. The smells of blood and the smells of the hospital disappeared from under my nose. The taste of blood in my mouth disappeared; the sweet metal taste was gone. The feeling and taste of the plastic tube slipped away. Everything slipped into darkness.

I have no regrets.

**Moon:** So we have two more chapters on our hands, maybe. Maybe one, but more then likely two. Please let me know what you thought.


	11. Closure

**Moon: **Guess what. Guess whatguesshwatguess what. I'm finished with this story. I'm not going to post the ending until next week, however.

Thank you to Saffy for taking over for Ryuuie in the proofing department. Ryuuie's computer died so she could not finish this out for me, however I still want to thank her for all of the wonderful things she has done for me and this story and when she writes her book :featuring the _real_ Yuukou: I expect you all to buy it and read it. It's the real version of her fanfiction Douka, which can be found on her account hopefully if she decides to repost it.

On to the story: I own nothing.

ONE MORE CHAPTER!

Minamino Shiori sat in a pure white waiting room. The tiled floors had specks of color, but the walls didn't. The ceiling was pure white and only broke for the big double doors leading into different rooms and wings.

The only color was the black and blue waiting room chairs, provided for the comfort of the families of the resident loved ones.

A TV in the corner provided a perverse hum, interrupting the respectful silence for those waiting for the same reason as the navy haired woman in the corner. Though turned for subtitles, it was evident that there was an electrical buzz in the room. It was something you couldn't see, or really hear. You just knew it was there.

A woman came in sobbing in her husbands arms. The doctor that accompanied them looked around the room before resting his eyes on the navy haired woman in the corner. She was alone.

"Minamino Shiori," he said, plainly. He held little emotion, calling her back to retrieve her dead son's belongings. He had held the same enthusiasm when he had informed the sobbing woman of her mother's fall to Leukemia.

Shiori stood, holding her black pocketbook tightly in both hands daintily in front of her. The warm weather had permitted her being out in a long skirt and a short sleeve blouse.

A rose key-charm hung off of her pocketbook.

The doctor led her back, asking of her husband and why he had not been to work at the hospital for several weeks.

"We were on vacation, when we got the call. He did not return with me." The man looked at her a little startled, knowing her husband's mannerisms. He was not one to let a woman travel alone, let alone his own wife.

"And young Suuichi?" the doctor looked ahead, through his thick-rimmed glasses.

Shiori took a moment before answering. "He…is not happy. He is staying with his father." She was not his birth mother and thus had no legal rights over the boy; however upon learning of his step-brother's actions, he had refused to leave Shiori's side, wanting nothing to do with his father.

The navy-haired woman had told the young Suuichi over the phone that he could not come with her as she returned home. Shiori had not told her step-son the real reason though.

That she was as much at fault as her husband, so being with one was not much better then the other.

At least she had remorse.

--

It was their second day in Disney Tokyo when Shiori got the call. A predominant doctor at the local hospital, the one her husband worked at, called her husband's cell phone. Shiori had picked up her husband's phone by mistake that day, little Suuichi had his own. Her husband had taken her own. They were separating that day. Suuichi wanted to ride rides, her husband wanted to look into maybe moving there, and she had wanted to go to the shopping district.

The hospital's number flashed on the blue LCD screen in her hand. Thinking it was about her husband's resignation, Shiori picked up fully expecting to explain his reasons for wanting to move to the capital. She had not, however, been expecting what she heard.

The doctor addressed her formally before explaining what had happened. That Uremessi boy's recount of when he found Shuuichi at their home, a knife lodged in his chest by his own doing. How the boy quickly called the hospital, and how they had tried to help Shuuichi.

They had tried to help Shuuichi. The man was fully prepared to feed Shuuichi life blood to replenish the supply he had pushed out; however Shuuichi had been screaming and thrashing. The red headed teenager had been yelling for something to stop. He had been thrashing, kicking, punching, not allowing anyone near him, and pushing the blood out faster.

Shiori couldn't believe what she was hearing. Immediately she called her husband in tears, sobbing over the phone in the middle of Tokyo. Instead of condolences, however, all Shiori got was a 'good riddance'.

She had kicked her only son out, and now, he was gone for good. Her husband had literally thrown him out the back door. And over what? A skirt and a dirty magazine?

Was it worth her only son's life?

Shiori flew home that night without a word while Suuichi was still in the park riding rollercoaster's and while her husband was still meeting with potential landlords. She had taken all of her belongings with her and left the boy's things for them, nicely neat and laid out for the duration of their stay.

She wouldn't be going back to Tokyo.

Taking the train from the airport and walking home from the nearest station, she met a young raven-haired boy at the door.

Yuusuke had been taking care of her house for her. He had cleaned the blood from Shuuichi's bedroom wall and had attempted to get the stain out of the carpet, but it wouldn't come.

Upon seeing him, Shiori hugged him tightly, disregarding society's formal rules. The taller boy hugged her and let her cry for a while before taking her to Shuuichi's room.

"He had cleaned it and changed cloths before I found him…He had a new haircut," Yuusuke said off-handedly as she kneeled down in her boy's place of death.

On top of caring for the house, Yuusuke had also gone through Shuuichi's cell phone and called his friends. Shiori knew it must have been hard for the other. It had been hard enough for her to call her husband, somebody who hated Shuuichi, and tell him. She couldn't image calling people who loved Shuuichi.

Yuusuke told her the different reactions. Kuwabara had been in the hospital with a broken ankle when Shuuichi went and he ended up trying to beat Yuusuke up for his lies. Kieko and Botan had started crying. Genkai was silent before going to light an incense stick and pray. Hiei was no where to be found.

Some man named Yuukou had called and assumed Yuusuke was Shuuichi when he answered. He went off, asking why Shuuichi had tried to call so many times in five minutes, before apologizing for not answering. He had been on a date with his boyfriend, someone who he had met dancing in Tokyo or something like that. Yuusuke wasn't entirely sure. When Yuusuke finally got the man's attention and told him, Yuukou was silent for a moment before declaring he'd be at the funeral and hanging up very, very silently.

Then Yuusuke had called Shiori, which was what he had been dreading most.

--

Shiori looked down at the face of her son. The white sheet had been pulled away for a moment. It took all her will power to not cry, but she pulled it off. Shuuichi had always told her he hated to see her cry, so she wouldn't. After a few minutes she put the sheet back over him and the doctor gave him her possessions, including his dad's pocket knife.

Shiori turned and left; a bag of personal items on her arm and her pocketbook in her hand. She left the hospital. Plans for Shuuichi's body had already been made.

Shiori walked home, enjoying the cool breeze through the increasingly warmer days. It was nice that the snow had melted.

--

A week later there was a funeral at her house. Everyone attended, including a man named Yuukou and every girl and boy in Shuuichi's class. Shiori had chosen not to tell Shuuichi's secrets to those who didn't already know, thinking it what her son would have wanted.

Three days later the boy was buried. She chose burial instead of the customary cremation because he had always been such a beautiful boy. It was pointless to let anything other then nature ruin that.

Three weeks later the divorce papers came through.

--

Yuusuke was on his way to his late friend's house. He had known how close he was to Shiori; after all he had stolen the forlorn hope for her. The raven haired boy thought his friend would not want his mother to be alone, so he had taken to spending a lot of time with her.

On his walk, two things kept coming to mind. The first was Kieko's confession. She had come to him the night of the funeral and confessed the real reason for their break up. Yuusuke couldn't help but wonder, if she had been truthful, would Shuuichi be lying dead?

The other thing that kept invading Yuusuke's thoughts was perhaps the most peculiar thing that could happen in such a situation. None of the ferry girls had been sent to retrieve Shuuichi's soul. When Koenma was confronted, the demi-god had said that he had never had any indication that the soul left the body. However, it was certain that the human body was dead.

He couldn't help but wonder if Shuuichi had pulled a Youko.

**Moon: **REVIEW!


	12. If Only

**Moon: **Well, this is the end folks. I have good news and bad news. I'll tell you the bad news at the end of this very short chapter. I'll tell you the good news now.

I have a new story idea for a Kurama/Hiei pairing and I already have the first chapter written. The people I have showed it to seem pleased so far and want me to continue so as soon as I get started on Chapter 2, I'll post it. The whole premise for it is the sentence, "Young male prostitute has affair with shogun." Anyway...

Read on. I own nothing

---- 

The birds chirped and the sun beat down on Japan for the first time in a long time. Tokyo had experienced its longest winter on record and the snow was finally heeding to the grass's thirst for air, receding to produce water for the flowers it had been depriving for so long.

The first of the flowers were peeking up in the cemetery where a newly dug grave sat, a pile of brown interrupting the waves of green and white.

A lone visitor spotted the grave from a distant tree beginning to bud. His red eyes surveyed the area and he disappeared, leaving the tree to the birds. A squirrel was scarred off as he reappeared in front of the freshly cut tomb stone. The man moved some hair out of his eyes as he looked at the pictures, flowers, and lone hairbrush that adorned the base of the stone. He leaned down and added a rose to the mix.

"You picked the wrong man to lust after." Hiei's voice was low with an eerie lack of emotion in it. Before the squirrel could get all the way hidden behind the distant tree, Hiei disappeared, leaving the lifeless land behind him.

-----

**Moon: **Bad news: I'm not telling you whether or not Kurama pulled a Youko. Use your imaginations and love the feeling of possibilities and remember to look for my new fic within the next few weeks.


	13. Epilogue

**Moon**: Regarding Red eyes, it's turned into an original story instead of a fanfiction, so I won't be posting it anymore. With shotting copywrite laws and thieves out there, I just don't want to deal with any possible theft with something I'd like to one day publish.

That being said, enjoy the epilogue epilogue of Orenji. I was planning on writing this but today I just felt the need to finally do it. I couldn't put it off anymore. Its probably ridden with errors. I didn't get it beta read because I wanted to post it as soon as I wrote it.

Review if you like it.

* * *

Golden eyes looked past the group in the forest

Golden eyes looked past the group in the forest. Camping? No one camped here. Who would? No one. It was a disgusting place: dirt and rotted leaves everywhere. The yellow foliage blended perfectly with the milky puss-yellow sky that hung above. Everything was monochromatic. Nothing stuck out; there was no beauty. Besides, it was dangerous. Who would camp there? No one. Why would they? It was a disgusting place.

The golden eyes darted—was that a squirrel? Something to chase? Maybe tonight's dinner? But the flash was gone. A very unnerved feeling overtook the spy and he turned to flee, both tails dragging by hind him silently. As far as he was concerned, these humans could camp out and die. There were predators in the forest—worse then him. He just wanted dinner, but others were flesh thirsty. As far as he was concerned, they could stay, he hadn't been seen, and he could just eat some wild berries instead. He was a man of diverse tastes.

--

"I don't like this place," the red head sneezed. "It's creepy. The sky is supposed to be blue!" He sneezed again. Demon pollen—not Kuwabara Kazuma's best friend.

Yuusuke looked at his pale pasty companion. "Don't be such a baby," he said and swatted at a bird-sized mosquito. "We're here to do a job, and these things can't be rushed. Keep your peace." His eye's flickered to Hiei as he came back. "See anything?"

Hiei looked at Yuusuke and stayed quiet for a moment, thinking. "I don't think he remembers us. He caught a glimpse of me and ran off." Hiei chose his words carefully, voice low so he wouldn't be overheard. "He's just a pup. A kit. Ten years is a short time for a human, but it's even shorter for a demon, yet alone a fox who's seen millennia pass before his eyes."

Yuusuke nodded and watched as a fire appeared in the fire pit he had made. The rocks started to glow red. He pulled out a bag of food to roast. Hiei passed but Kuwabara was happy to partake. "Wouldn't he remember though?" Kuwabara asked after a while. "He remembered his first life when he was a human." Out of respect, neither of his companions responded. They knew well enough: Kurama's death had been a time of weakness for him. Never would he act in such a way under normal circumstances. He had once been a strong fighter and thief who could rape any woman—or man—he wanted. Of course the little kitsune would now block his human life from memory, out of shame.

Yuusuke put a hand on his bag to feel that his charge was still among the cushioning. As he felt the hard surface below he lost himself in thought. The reflection of flames licked his eyes. What a horrible reason to disturb a child's peace.

--

A man with many ears once could see but now without eyes. He should take revenge. He should have killed the baby fox as soon as he saw it ten years ago. His heart had been softened though. It had been well over a hundred years since Youko Kurama had sent that assassin after him, but if he had not, would he be where he was today? He had a son, he had a city, and he had the chance to rule the Makai. If he hadn't been spurned and thrown from his band of thieves, he'd probably be nothing but a pick-pocket now. It's funny how a butterfly flapping its wings in the east can cause a hurricane in the west.

A man with many ears and a softened heart placed the plate of food at the base of the kit's tree and then hid behind a branch and heard the little two-tailed beast come back, surprised to have his dinner ready. The kit turned the food with his nose and then dug in, having not identified any poison. He didn't know who brought him such food, but he was happy. He let out a little bark of joy and thanks and then jumped up to the knot in his tree and curled up within the bark, happy to sleep off his free meal.

Yomi smiled and watched the little Youko until he fell asleep before he left to go back to his city.

--

Come morning, Yuusuke woke to Hiei snapping a bug in half with his sword. Kuwabara had a bump of his head from where it had been feeding. He couldn't help but to crack a smile as he stood up and put out the fire. Hiei wiped his sword and sheathed it. They packed up their things to be on their way.

Three thorn bushes, a man eating plant, and a bushel of poison oak later and Kuwabara wanted to turn home. Hiei wasn't having any trouble, of course, and Yuusuke could dodge most of the danger. "How will he even know who she was anyway?" Kuwabara asked exasperated.

"It was her last wish," Yuusuke said firmly. Nothing could shake him from his task. Hiei looked at the detective, red eyes shining. Yuusuke had spent every day with Shiori until she died. The disease Kurama had once fought off for his mother had come back. The forlorn hope was broken. Shiori was broken. He felt for the urn containing her ashes again. The porcelain was cold and air tight. Yuusuke was devastated.

"He won't remember her as his mother!" Kuwabara tried again, earning a punch from Hiei. "Shut up," he said gruffly and the red head's lips snapped shut. Yuusuke glanced over, glad for Hiei's assertiveness. He shot Hiei a thankful nod.

Hiei avoided his gaze. Ten years and Hiei was the only one who had remained unchanged in looks. Yuusuke's hair had gotten thinner, but had still maintained the look he once had. He wore it down now that he had a salary job. Kuwabara had the domineer of a married man. Both humans had aged lines in their faces. Both were slower, both were stronger. One was a little clumsier then he had been before, the other a sad disposition.

Hiei was not left completely unchanged. He had avoided his old companions since Kurama's death. He hid out and found his own shelter. He especially avoided Yuusuke. Yuusuke knew why: he was to blame for Kurama's death.

--

Youko popped his head out of his tree and looked around. Was it safe? Yes. Yes it—A SQUERREL! He jumped down to chase the little beast. Of course he still remembered his first life as a fox: the domineering fighter and thief. But he also knew he was a kid now. He needed to retrain his body to hunt and squirrel chasing was the best way.

Yomi listened from the clearing. Youko knew Yomi was there and Yomi knew Youko knew, but they avoided each other. Youko was glad to have the other there to look out for him, but he'd never give in to his feelings of companionship. He didn't remember their reconsolidation as a human, so as far as he was concerned, the other still sought revenge.

With a squirrel between his jaws, Youko went to the stream side and licked the floor off of his kill. He wet his nose in the stream and drank before eating his kill.

--

Yuusuke followed Hiei to Yomi's energy signal. They greeted each other with a handshake and Yomi told the others about Youko's life so far. He was just a kit growing up. He knew Yomi was there but did not come close: a clear indicator he remembered his first life, but not his second. The threesome listened and Yuusuke glanced at Kuwabara. "If you want to go home, have Yomi take you…" Kuwabara nodded. He needed to leave and go home to his wife and kids. Yomi left with the other. He was no longer needed.

Yuusuke turned his head to Hiei. Hiei was ahead of the other, though, and he disappeared. Yuusuke took a step forward and sat at the edge of the oak, waiting for Youko's return.

--

Youko rolled around in the grass and stretched out. He was ready to go back. He plopped up, counting his tails. Still only two. He waved them from side to side for a moment before trotting back to his clearing.

He came to a stop. That wasn't a squirrel. It was a human. There was a human at his tree. Why? He bared his teeth.

Yuusuke starred at Youko. Chocolate eyes met golden ones and for some reason Youko felt his growl disappear. What? Who was this man? He approached cautiously.

Yuusuke held out his hand, letting Youko come to him. Youko was just too curious. He went to go smell Yuusuke cautiously before rubbing his head against it, acting like a cat, rubbing his scent over his new pet human. Yuusuke smiled and cautiously ran a hand over the other's head, scratching behind his ears. Youko plopped down next to him, tails wrapped around his small foxxie body.

Yuusuke looked at him. "Youko Kurama," he murmured. "We were looking for you. We have something for you." Youko didn't recoil. He was too curious. Yuusuke took his hand from the fox's ears and he opened the his bag, pulling out the urn.

"You don't remember who she is," he murmured, "But trust me. You loved her and she loved you. Her last wish was for you to scatter her ashes." Youko looked at Yuusuke and turned into a three-foot-tall, ten-year-old child. "Who was she?"

Yuusuke looked at the boy with silver hair. He was beautiful even as a tiny tot. "Your human mother. You blocked it from memory. Yomi and clarify." He set the urn down and stood up, stretching. "When you're grown up, come look for me. Yuusuke. We never got the chance to fight." He smiled and earned a smirk from the fox. He looked to the other, a bit sad, and went to leave. Youko picked up the urn and went to walk in the other direction.

--

Hiei watched in the trees, spiteful, but glad Yuusuke made his peace.

There was a flash.

He was gone.

When the wind picked up behind him, black snow fell, coating the ground.

Shiori would be happy.

**Moon**: Kurama pulled a Youko.


End file.
